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this is lowkey a crack chapter im sorryjshsh

also,, double update uwu
——————

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
so

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
ure friends with art major kim taehyung huh

he knows other colors:
oh god

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
yes he looks like a god wbk sis

he knows other colors:
...

he knows other colors:
remind me again why im friends with you

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
im platonically your soulmate** not ur friend wtf we've talked abt this coconut head

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
oh wait my bad i forgot u dyed your hair red lmao thought you only knew black and 50 shades of brown

he knows other colors:
shut up

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
wait no dont leave ;((

he knows other colors:
what do u want im in the middle of cuddling here

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
aww 💘💕💖 tell her i said hi

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
n e ways,,, kim taehyung 👉👈

he knows other colors:
,,,what did u do to him

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
oh sweaty i wish i could do something to him yknow 😔

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
but YOU can uwu

he knows other colors:
no thanks

he knows other colors:
last time i set you up with my friend you only weirded them out and they never talked to me after lmao

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
i helped you get a fake friend off your shoulders how can you offend your own soulmate like this

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
...pls :((

he knows other colors:
lmao no bye

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
smh i knew this friendship was useless

ChongCheonjuBalsa:
i'll just ask youngie then, she's nice unlike u ugly ass

——————

ice cream:
sooo

ice cream:
ure friends with art major kim taehyung huh

smeraldo:
xxx-xxx-xxxx

smeraldo:
ure welcome 😘

ice cream:
oH MY GOD I LOVE YOU MARRY ME

ice cream:
okay but what do i tell him oh fuck i cant do this

smeraldo:
dude,, u literally confessed to jungkook back then face to face,,, just be bold or smth bc im preeetty sure youre his type

ice cream:
shit u right im a fine woman i can do this

——————

I can't do this. I wasn't that whipped for Guk when I confessed to him but this man. This Kim Taehyung, a fine ass man, a man so ethereal that I think I already saw heaven when I laid my eyes on him. The man I knew I wanted to marry on a beach with my cousin on the background looking for crabs. The man I'm totally whipped for, the Kim Taehyung.

unknown number:
hello! :)

unknown number:
someone told me u like me uwu

unknown number:
does that mean i can ask you on a date now that the feeling is mutual? 👉👈

loml💜:
uh sir this is a mcdonald's drive thru

unknown number:
ah :( did youngie gave me the wrong number :((

——————

ice cream:
wHATJJHSJAHS

ice cream:
yOU GAVE /THE KIM TAEHYUNG/ MY NUMBER???

smeraldo:
i mean 👉👈 u were clearly panicking over texting him so i told him to text u 👉👈

smeraldo:
aaaa he's whining to me abt giving him the wrong number

smeraldo:
just reply to the poor boy or he wont stop whining jesus im tired of hearing u both drool over each other can yall pls date already and save my cheonhyung heart

ice cream:
hE?? he LIKES me ??

ice cream:
oh my god okay im okay im calm im gonna reply to him now

——————

mcdonald's drive thru:
hello yes i love u a lot im whipped and i'd love to go on a date with u

mcdonald's drive thru:
how does a beach wedding sound?

my precious baby:
uhm sorry i thought you were someone i know but i can set you up on a date with a friend of mine mcdonald's drive thru-nim!

mcdonald's drive thru:
SKSKJSKHJ

mcdonald's drive thru:
oh you cute little bean :((

mcdonald's drive thru:
it's me cheonju uwu

my precious baby:
w hat

loml💜:
so

loml💜:
how does a beach wedding sound?

Delivered Sincerity || JJK✔️Where stories live. Discover now