From Up Here

10

|| Ryker ||      

She is no longer a hurricane, a storm, or even waves - she's like the warm rays of the sun. The simplest of things, but one that many people take for granted. The way that I felt that night with Ryan, the way that I felt free from myself and like a totally different person - it can only compare to the way it feels to stand in the sunlight after being caught in the rain for endless days. 

That's what my life feels like most days, a rainy afternoon where I have no umbrella and keep stepping in puddles. It was refreshing and exhilarating to feel be free for a night, even it was for just one night. 

I haven't seen Ryan in the few days that have passed since the concert. I spent the weekend working at the store and didn't run into her in the elevators, the hallway, or even on the streets, none of which surprises me. However, I can't get her simple smile or her bright hair out of my head. 

Link spent the entire weekend rushing back and forth between our dad and the shop, doing nothing but pestering me for details about my night with Ryan while running around the shop and getting in my way. I don't know what he was expecting to have happened, but he wasn't satisfied with my recap. To be fair though, my recap was only, "It was fine." 

I reach for the yellow coloring pencil on my desk and begin to fill in the outline of her hair on the thick paper. It's frustrating that I can't get it right, that I keep drawing her over and over again, changing tiny details and still not getting it perfect. Each time that I think I'm getting close to completing the piece, she does something or gives me a look that makes me think of her in a whole new light - causing me to start anew. 

The hardest part is always her eyes and as I look at them now, drawn in charcoal, I realize that I'll never be able to fully capture the permanent glint that is always present in the unusual shade of blue. 

This isn't right. I got it all wrong. Again. 

I throw the yellow pencil at the wall and watch as it bounces back and falls to the floor, then I throw the sketchbook after it. Running my hands through my hair I  mumble a string of profanities as my frustration builds. 

Drawing is always easier on the rooftop, but with the thunderstorm happening outside right now, the roof isn't an option. Thunder claps and lightening cracks outside and I let out a heavy sigh. I'm going to go crazy stuck in this apartment for the rest of the night with nothing but my art taunting me. 

Times like these are when I wish that I had friends, not that any of them would venture out in a thunderstorm to hang out in my boring apartment. 

I've never been someone who takes naps or binge watches television, but right now they both sound appealing. Anything sounds better than making another pathetic attempt to perfect my sketch.

As I mindlessly flip through the many shows on Netflix I let myself wonder what Ryan is doing at the moment. Is she home? Is she working on her next project or maybe even the bike shop? Maybe she's watching Netflix or taking a nap. She might not even be at home, but if she is, would she mind if I knock on her door? 

 I get up off the couch and am about to walk across the hallway to see if Ryan is home, but before I make it to my own door I turn around and make my way back to the couch. I repeat this a few more times before I finally sit back down and click on the first show on my suggested list. 

As the show starts up, before it has a chance to begin, there's a knock at my door. I almost don't hear it due to the ongoing thunder that keeps getting louder and louder as time passes. Pausing the television I go to the door, having no idea who could be on the other side but opening it without checking the peephole anyway. 

And there she stands, in leggings and an over sized sweater. Her bright blonde hair is pulled up on top of her head and she didn't even bother to put on shoes, instead she's only wearing a pair of fuzzy purple socks. Her blue eyes are on me as I stand there with my mouth open in surprise. "Hey."

"Hey, do you want some cereal?" She holds up a box of Cinnamon Toast Crunch in one hand and a carton of milk in the other. 

"I, uh..." A loud clap of thunder rattles the windows and the rain begins to fall heavier than before, causing Ryan to jump as her eyes dart to the window behind me. 

"If you don't want my cereal, that's fine. But can I maybe hang out with you for awhile? If you're not busy that is." She chews on her bottom lip and jumps again when lightening follows the thunder. 

"Are you afraid of thunderstorms?" 

"What? No." I raise my brow and cross my arms, watching as she shifts her weight and looks towards the window again. "Okay, maybe a little bit. But only when I'm alone." 

I take a step back, making way for her to enter my apartment, "There better be enough cereal in that box for the both of us." 

"It's a brand new box!" She practically runs past me and toward the couch as I close the door behind her and grab two bowls and spoons from the kitchen. I take a seat next to her and she hands me the box of cereal as I hand her a bowl and spoon. 

"What are you watching?" She points to the television, the show I had just started still paused on the screen. 

"Nothing. I just clicked something. We can watch whatever you want." 

She reaches for the controller as I pour my cereal. "Have you ever seen Gossip Girl?"

I look up from pouring milk into my bowl and give her a blank look as she watches me, wide eyed. "What do you think?" 

"Great, let's start it!"