The Contract

Catching Feelings

One Month Later

Yoongi's POV

They had been married for seven months now and it felt like they were finally friends. She had decided to major in Economics at Seoul National University, in addition to keeping up her Korean studies. As a self-proclaimed nerd, the social science was right up her alley. Yoongi found it amusing, the more her Korean developed the more her 'Korean' personality came out. It wasn't really that different from her English one, the women of her home country were regarded as fiercely opinionated and she definitely lived up to that. She was just able to express her opinions better in her second language.

At first he couldn't understand her still, but then he realized it was because her explanation of 'opportunity cost' was brainy and he got distracted wondering how these thoughts even crossed her mind. He had the same problems with Namjoon sometimes.

Also like Namjoon, she didn't mind if it wasn't your interest. She just wanted to feel listened to. Who would've thought his years in the band would've been marriage preparation.  Certainly not him.

Yoongi was impressed by her determination in her studies. The only thing they heard from his uncle was the adviser who kept coming to give her lessons. He still wondered what she had done to scare his uncle so badly.

One night he was in his studio later than usual. Taehyung had a song idea and Yoongi was trying to see if he could make it work. But he couldn't focus. He yawned and sat back. His mind drifted to the picture. He tried to tell himself no but his phone was out and he was looking at that picture of them at that BBQ place. He found himself smiling and abruptly put his phone down. But he couldn't stop looking at her face and picked it up again. Why...why...why...

It hit him like a ton of bricks and he couldn't hide from it anymore. Couldn't lie to himself anymore. He loved her. He couldn't run from it. He couldn't hide from it. He loved her. And that scared him. He tossed his phone onto the desk and covered his face with his hands. Wasn't he giving his uncle what he wanted? Would she...this thought scared him more...would she even want him in return?

He took a deep breath.

He was connected to a negative event in her life. If she ever got the chance wouldn't she run from that? His chest ached. They may be friends but nothing Y/N had done convinced him that his lonely, beautiful wife wouldn't choose freedom in an instant. He sighed. He had to get over it. It wouldn't be fair to put this kind of burden on her.

"What's up?" Namjoon asked when Yoongi entered his studio. These days his hyung usually looked worn out and today was no different.

"I, uh...I guess I just needed to talk." Yoongi said, not looking him in the eye.

"About what?" Namjoon had a feeling he knew where this was going.

"I think...I think like Y/N. And I don't know what to do." Yoongi blurted out after a minute of silence.

"Well, it's about time you figured it out."

"You knew?"

"We all knew." Namjoon couldn't help laughing. Yoongi blushed a little. "But you're worried she doesn't feel the same way and about the whole situation with your uncle."

"Neh."

"Do you feel comfortable telling her?"

"No. If she doesn't like me back it'll make things really awkward. And I don't..." He paused. "If she doesn't she might worry I'll try and force it. I don't want to see that on her face when I look at her." Namjoon nodded thoughtfully.

"Then do what you can to maintain the friendship."

On the way home Yoongi thought about the question she had asked him several weeks ago. Was this it? Did he have to live the rest of his life like this?

He found ways to stay busy the next few days and be at home as little as possible as he worked through his emotions and braced himself for a lifetime of hiding his heart.

And when he felt like he had finally clamped down on his emotions, he began inviting her to their activities. Going to school and studying now took up a lot of her time but sometimes she would study at BigHit's office while the band did dance practice and worked out.