Don't lie

Let's keep it that way

You smiled at me for the first time in a while and i almost cried of joy when i saw that smile facing me for once. But it disappeared as fast as it came.. when you then turned around and then looked back at me i saw yet again a frown.  But it is okay i was the one that had to 'smile' so you could at least now that it was fine leaving me here in the cold.

When i saw you come home i saw that you were crying so with With out hesitation i hugged you tight so you would now that there was no point in those tears since there was always some on in love with you. But when you hugged back i could not feel the love that you once felt towards me but it is okay because at least you stopped crying and then pushed me away and walked upstairs..again.

I then wen't to the basement again in pain in tears, in 'grief' it's been over 9 years but no matter what i do i seem to still be in pain knowing i could never see him again. Knowing that he was not here to see me in pain as well. You know that i loved you but you hid away and so did 'he' it's fine though because who would ever love someone like me?

When i was laying down on the couch i heard footsteps then i felt two hands grab me and then you carried me. I still had my eyes closed so you wouldn't let go of me, so i won't lose your warming touch. Then i felt your left leg get up from the ground then i heard a loud bang once you pushed the door of your home. Why? Why were you taking me in here? Don't you want me in the cold? was the questions that was in my head as you then put i felt the soft touch of the bed below me. 

it was strange being on here, it has been so long since I've been on one of these that i forgot the name of the strange object covering me with heat and the comfort of my back. I felt safe in over 9 years i felt like i was home but i know very well that it would end as soon as it came like 'him'. Foe know my love i shall sleep in the warmth near you but the next day i know very well this won't happen.

SO don't worry i won't get used to it, like i shouldn't have got used to you loving me in your arms. Like how i should have never gotten used to happiness, yet it's been years since I've been happy but you don't now that, let's keep it that way....

**please vote**

what would you give this book 1-10 just let me know please