Chapter 13: For the Lost Pieces of Me

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My son

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My son.

My firstborn.

Dead.

My precious (Y/N) wounded in flesh and soul, lulling a dead body of what was supposed to be our major happiness.

My life was being destroyed in front of my eyes because of their lust for blood. Their damn war! Their cursed fight that I couldn't handle anymore!

"Hvitserk, calm down, brother"

Those blue eyes that made me safe for so long now were just igniting the fury inside my soul causing my voice to sound loud and clear when I pushed Ubbe out of the tent with all my strength, throwing him on the ground, near Ivar's feet.

"I SAID OUT!"

My throat was burning. Was it what Ivar felt every time he yelled with Sigurd? It wasn't time for questions... I was so tired... My brothers were looking at me with the same surprised expression on their faces, but I wouldn't stop this time. I wouldn't be silent anymore.

My silence cost my son's life. My wife's soul.

"I'm tired of your damn childish behavior! I'm tired of you! Both of you! That's enough for me and don't you dare to open your fucking mouth, Ubbe!" I yelled, pointing my finger towards his face before he could use the breath he took to speak. "I'm sick of your damn speeches! I'm not your damn little brother! I'm not a fucking child anymore! Neither of us is, but you two insist in acting as if we were! You, trying to control everything around you, to bring back a damn past that is already gone! Fuck, Ubbe! Grow the damn up! Your childhood is over! It will never come back! And you..." My eyes turned to Ivar "You crippled piece of shit! I don't fucking care about your damn feelings because every-fucking-body did it for your entire damned life and guess what, Ivar, it didn't change shit about your arrogance! You're just a damn spoiled boy trying to put the world on your feet as our mother were for your entire life! You're not trying to avenge her! You're just trying to tell everyone that nobody can touch what you say it's yours! And I'm fucking tired of your shitty behavior!"

"What?" Ivar said, too shocked to be angry with my words.

"You're not thinking straight, Hvitserk" Ubbe tried, but I just yelled even louder to shut his mouth.

"I SAID YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP! I don't wanna hear you, Ubbe! I don't want your damn advice! I don't want your pity, your feelings! I AM thinking straight for the first damn time of my life and wanna know what?" I pulled my sword and Ivar took a step back when I pointed it at him "You two wanna fight, right? So let's do it!"

"I SAID YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP! I don't wanna hear you, Ubbe! I don't want your damn advice! I don't want your pity, your feelings! I AM thinking straight for the first damn time of my life and wanna know what?" I pulled my sword and Ivar took a ...

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