Stars and Diamonds

Chapter 37: Reflection

And so the DiamondBomb event begins! Hope everyone enjoys these five days of updates.

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Pink sat hunched over her command desk, her head resting in the hallow of her folded arms as tears gathered in her eyes from a mixture of frustration, sadness and anger. Pearl had been next to her through her bouts of extreme emotions, there for her as her most faithful friend, all while she paced back and forth. One moment she was making loud huffing sounds and punching gestures with her hands and then spontaneously breaking into tears in another. Finally, she had just collapsed into her chair and asked Pearl for time alone. Pearl had left reluctantly, and she was sure she was just standing outside the door, but it was enough. At least she wouldn't see as Pink had another break down.

It had been almost two weeks since her call with White Diamond, Zirconia had still not contacted her, and that worried her. She could not entirely trust White's word, no matter how serious she had looked when Pink had accused her of putting Zirconia in that isolation tower, the same tower she was more than familiar with, and one she would live a happy life to never see the inside of again. Pink's mind had bounced between rational thinking to paranoid thoughts, as the time since she had begged to speak with her own daughter had dragged on. What if White was lying? What if she hadput her there and Zirconia was currently suffering and Pink had no way of knowing for sure, no way of helping her. Or what if the others were lying to her, keeping Zirconia from her as some kind of ploy to ensure that her Colony was finished. Without Zirconia here, she couldn't say she had to spend time concentrating on her. What if they had told her she didn't want to see her again after what happened on her station?

Tears sprung to her eyes at the memory, how hurt Zirconia had looked when she had faltered to come to her, to comfort her. Pink had failed to be there for her when she had needed her. It had been Blue who had held her as she cried. Yellow's offered words, however reluctant they had seemed, that had reassured her. All while Pink had stood there, staring, unsure what to do and feeling like she was a stranger invading a moment she was not welcome to. She felt like she was being pushed out of her own daughter's life, through her fellow diamond's actions, and her own inaction.

Zirconia was being pulled away from her, and Pink was starting to feel helpless to fight it. After she had gotten her colony, Pink had promised herself she would never allow the others to make her feel so helpless as she had on Homeworld again, and yet here she was. How many times had she felt she couldn't do anything for Earth, to stop their invasion? To help the rebel gems that simply wanted to live their lives away from Homeworld's oppressive rule, how she could relate to that same desire. How many times had she felt like she had failed Zirconia because of her choice to help the Earth?

Pink had gotten the clear impression Zirconia held distain for Earth, though her Pearl had eventually clarified what was really on the younger gem's mind, she had made the attempt to refrain from talking about it and the humans as much as she could, not that she could have told her about her time spent as Rose Quartz, the rebel gem that was fighting herself and her colony's expansion. It was obvious to her that Zirconia was incredibly loyal to Homeworld and her fellow Diamonds, and she would not take easily to her views of how wrong it was that what they were doing to organic lives and their planets was wrong.

She knew that the more time she spent with the other three, the less they found common ground, the less it was like when she looked at her with such admiration and love. She didn't even call her mother anymore! She could hardly contain herself when Zirconia started to refer to her as Pink, and only Pink. When had she gone from Mother to just Pink? Just what had the other diamonds done to her? They were changing Zirconia in front of her very eyes and it had taken her this long to even recognize just how deep that change went.

A pang of guilt hit her and she covered her face with her hands to muffle the sob she couldn't hold back. She had promised more time with Zirconia, but that time had never really come. The growing rebel group needed her, she needed them, Yellow and Blue refused to listen, and that abomination of a zoo they had made to placate her before was a mockery of what she really wanted. Why couldn't they just leave this place? Why couldn't she have just gotten another colony, especially after she had begun to fight Homeworld as Rose Quartz. It should have scared them away, but instead she was pushed to fight harder. It was difficult leading the two lives, even more difficult when Zirconia was here, because she couldn't just sneak off.

It made her question if it all was really worth it. Did the Earth and its organic life matter more to her than her relationship with Zirconia? If she gave all this up, here and now, would she even be able to mend everything that had been broken between them?

She let out both a sob and yell of frustration, and it came out as a strangled groan, tears soaking her gloves even more.

The earth needed her, and she adored the humans so much, and from her adoration she had gained her dearest little gem. Why did she now have to pick between them? She slammed her fist into the desk, leaving behind a crack in the stone top.

This wasn't right. She shouldn't have had to worry about Zirconia's life when she was on Homeworld. She should have been able to trust the other Diamonds, but she couldn't, and she shouldn't have had to choose between her daughter and Earth either. If only she had fought harder to keep Zirconia with her more often. What exactly had they even been telling her? Was this Yellow's doing? Was she grooming her to be some perfect replica of herself, because Pink didn't fit into the mold she thought she should? Or was this White? She wouldn't put it past her, especially after their last talk. First its don't call her Zirconia, she hasto be addressed as a Diamond, then it's she needsto be taught how to rule and she's forcefully carted off to Blue and Yellow while she's stuck here on her moon base. Why hadn't she fought just a little bit harder for Zirconia? For them? If she had, would she even be leading a rebellion right now? Or would she have considered Zirconia her first priority, and Earth second?

So many what ifs, and could haves, and should haves bounced around in her head, weighting down her heart. This was the life she had chosen, this was the consequences of her actions, and she'd have to live with it. Zirconia would have to live with it, never knowing how important the organic lives she was pushed to look down on really were. Never seeing the beauty of the planets even as she stood looking down on them from a moon base.

Pink was pulled from her spiraling thoughts as Pearl entered the room, looking rather nervous.

"Pearl, i still want to be alone." Pink winced at the croak in her voice when she spoke.

"My Diamond, forgive me, but there has been contact from the rebel groups down on earth."

Pink's eyebrows knitted together, her eyes still glossy from crying. "Is everything okay?"

"There have been Homeworld dropships spotted heading towards the Sky Arena. They have identified themselves to us as reinforcements from Homeworld."

"What?" Pink stood up, wiping her eyes clear, "Reinforcements for what?"

"Yellow and Blue Diamond are responding to your continued requests for help. To take the growing Rebel faction down. Yellow Diamond..." pearl paused, her nervous expression morphing into one of concern. "Yellow Diamond has suggested joining her forces with yours to start an attack. She wishes to take the Rebel occupied Arena."

Pink took a breath, a single moment to push her own problems to the back of her mind and settle her heart. In a brief flash of light, where Pink Diamond had once stood was now the smaller figure of a Rose Quartz. "Pearl, signal to the Rebels that want to fight. It's time we to stop them for good."

"We're going to fight them? Your own court?"

"We have no more options." The Rose Quartz descended the stairs to join Pearl on the lower platform. Forcing a smile, Pink placed a hand on Pearl's shoulder, "Let's go."

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Author: Hey! Lets go to war.

Who's side would you fight for? Are you for Homeworld, or the Rebels?