40. Accept + Astrology

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It's been six days since Jeffers' arrest.

Six days of it being over.

Haven and I had a long talk the night after everything went down, which had really helped me. We spent hours on the front porch swing, getting every last word out of our brains. We'd barely been able to function at school the next day, seeing as we'd stayed up until 4am, but it had been worth it. We'd cried our eyes out, sobbing in each others arms, and by the time we went to bed, puffy-eyed and delirious, we had both forgiven John Parker.

Tom Jeffers? Maybe in a few more years. Or decades. But for now, we're content. We feel free, like a burden has somehow been lifted from our shoulders.

I guess the truth always has a way of coming out.

I can't believe that after all this time... a man I've hated for over a decade turned out to have love and compassion in his heart.

We'd discussed the idea of going to visit John – or Jack, or whatever the hell his name is – but quickly nixed the idea and decided to talk about it another time. Everything is still too fresh for a move that rash. We also agreed to not tell mom until we were sure she was in a good enough place to handle it.

Today is May 4th, Haven's birthday.

It's a Saturday, and all Haven had requested was a birthday party like the summer days we used to spend as kids. That means he'd invited a bunch of friends to swim in the river, attempt to paddle board, float on inner tubes, eat sandwiches with chips on them, and lots of popsicles. Then, in the evening, roast hot dogs, make s'mores and break out some fireworks. But, of course, since it's Haven's party, there's also a lot of alcohol available.

A big group of us, juniors and seniors, as well as a handful of underclassmen, have been at the river since the early afternoon. We've taken over a large section of the riverbank. Girls scamper around in tiny bikinis while the guys try to flex without looking like they're flexing. There's loud music playing, groups of people drinking and playing card games on the barely-functioning picnic tables, and the air smells warm and coconut-y. People play-fight over blow up floats shaped like donuts, pizza slices, flamingos and unicorns.

Basically, it's the most laid back, amazing birthday party I've ever been to.

This morning, Haven and I had stopped by Goldcrest Rehabilitation Centre to visit mom. We thought it would be a quick trip, but when we sat down at the table, there was an official looking man in a starchy black suit who informed Haven that because he's officially 18, he needed to sign some documents. Then, he'd receive access to his half-a-million-dollar trust account.

We'd left the Centre two hours later, and I don't know if I've ever seen Haven so conflicted. Part of him was pumped that he was half a millionaire, but the other part of him had no idea what to do with the responsibility of having access to $500,000. So, we did what any reasonable person would do. We bought an absurd amount of snacks and drinks. Literally, we'd filled two carts to the brim, and the total had ended up being somewhere around $1,000. Everything barely fit between the trunk and backseat.

When we pulled up to the party (late) and began unloading everything, people went crazy. It was awesome.

The party has been in full swing for several hours, and I can't believe how much fun it actually is to just listen to music, soak in the sun, drink cool fruity drinks and hang out by the rippling water. And snack like my life depended on it, of course.

Life is good.

I lift up the waistband of my blue bikini, checking my tan line, and notice it's actually coming along quite nicely.

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