ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʟ ʙᴏʏ. || ᴍ.ʏɢ + ᴘ.ᴊᴍ ✔️

twenty-three: loving them will hurt us

"Just forget about it."

He couldn't stop hearing those words in his head. Repeating them to himself. Picturing Yoongi's troubled face as he had uttered them. And he couldn't stop crying, hating how badly he didn't want to forget about it, and how much the thought of Yoongi wanting to pretend it didn't happen hurt.

Frankly, Jimin was tired of crying over him. But that wasn't something he could just choose to stop doing. He had accepted it by now, just how deeply in love with Yoongi he had fallen.

Yoongi had been the one to kiss him. In denial, for a moment, Jimin considered it had been because Yoongi had wanted to kiss him. But the boy's panicked explanation to clarify his reasons struck Jimin like a brick to the head. It seemed Yoongi hadn't wanted to at all. He was only trying to save them from getting caught, and now he wanted to act like it had only been in their imaginations.

"I hate you, Min Yoongi..."

It took a while for Jimin to remember he was still wearing Yoongi's clothes. At one point he looked down at himself, catching sight of the vibrant rainbow sweater which his friend had seemed quite happy he tried on. Jimin slipped out of it and shoved it under the bed along with the rest of Yoongi's things.

Which was a lot of things.

It was going to be a pain in the neck to return all these.

Sighing, he made his way over to where he had left his clothes and put them back on, then collapsed onto his bed. It was around 11 p.m. by this point. He had spent more time crying than he thought.

Coincidentally, moments after Jimin had laid down, he heard his phone ring. He groaned, already expecting it to be Yoongi, and prepared to immediately end the call. But upon checking the caller ID he realized his mistake.

"Why's Joon calling me? He's at a party..." He reluctantly answered the call.

"...Jimin?"

Jimin grunted in response, sniffling.

"Uh...you okay?"

"No," Jimin replied in honesty. "But I don't wanna talk about it right now."

"Oh...okay...will you talk about it later?"

"I don't know. I'll think about it." He sniffled again, then heaved a sigh. "What did you call me for?"

Namjoon seemed to quickly snap back into focus. "Oh. Right. Uh..." There was a pause. "Okay, so the thing is, I never in my life thought I'd hear myself say this, but I think I might be bisexual."

Silence. Jimin, too tired to deal with his friend's jokes, remained silent for a few moments. "Ha-ha, very funny," he said, rolling his eyes. "Did you call me to just to waste my time? If that's the case then I'm hanging up on you now-"

"No, I'm not kidding!" Namjoon blurted, in a somewhat hush voice. "This is legit, and I'm not gonna lie, I'm kinda freaking out right now and you're the only person I can ask for help. What do you usually do to hide that you're nervous around a boy? Gosh, I can't believe those words just fell out of my mouth..."

More stunned silence. "...okay, Namjoon, what the actual."

"Look, Chim, I don't know, either. I didn't ask for him to make my heart beat like this, I'm literally panicking right now, this is so weird. To think some boy could do this to me...incredible. He's incredible."

It was odd. Jimin could typically sense when Namjoon was trying to prank him, because his tone of voice made it obvious. But right now Jimin sensed honesty. And that, to him, was absolutely bizarre.