°you shouldn't have come along°

▪︎part twelve▪︎

"I survived on scraps. Canned food, cockroaches, anything I could find. You know that rumor that Twinkies have an endless shelf life? Well, it's total bullshit." Five said slightly annoyed. Y/n sat staring guilty at the floor. She hated herself for him being stuck in the apocalypse. It should've been her. She gripped her wrist so tight her knuckles turned white as she rested them in her lap. Five noticed this and the gaze she held to the floor. She looked like a child who had been caught doing something they shouldn't and was yelled at.

He was unsure why she looked so upset but he took a wild guess that wasn't so wild. He knew she felt guilty but he didn't want her to. He was the one who had sent her back and that wasn't her fault. He was actually happy he had made her go back. He couldn't bare the idea of her struggling to survive like he did. But still the expression she wore hurt him and he nearly missed what Vanya said. "I couldn't imagine." She mumbled in disbelief.

"You do whatever it takes to survive, or you die. So we adapted. Whatever the world threw at us, we found a way to overcome it." Five said. Y/n looked up confused at the 'we' in that sentence. There was no one else alive when she was there. She had thought everyone was dead. Had he found survivors?

"We?" Vanya asked but Five ignored her lifting his cup. "You got anything stronger?" Vanya nodded before standing to go to the kitchen. Y/n followed her, afraid of Five's questioning about her behavior. She didn't want to tell him it was because she was guilty. She would've felt even worse. Y/n grabbed a glass from the cupboards, already knowing her way around since she was the one who helped Vanya move in. She set the glass beside Five's and Vanya poured the liquor into it as well.

"Should you guys even drink?" Vanya questioned but the look Y/n gave her quickly dismissed her question. They walked back to Five, who now stood pacing the small living room with a hard expression. She handed him the drink and he took a sip, grimacing at the bitterness of the liquor. Y/n sat on Vanya's couch, unable to think very well. She knew it was the alcohol which was actually helping to numb her painful thoughts. She imagined Five, fighting to live in the wasteland she had left him in. She took another sip as Vanya and Five talked.

"You think I'm crazy." Five said with a dry chuckle. "No. It's just-just a lot to take in." She stammered. "Exactly what don't you understand?" Five snarled and Y/n stood, ready to make Five back down if needed. "Why didn't you just time travel back?" Vanya asked. Five glanced at Y/n before glaring at Vanya. "Gee, wish I had thought of that." He retorted with a scoff. "Five." Y/n snapped. "Time travel is a crapshoot. I went into the ice and never acorn-ed. You think I didn't try everything to get back to my family?" He continued ignoring Y/n.

Both of them paused. Five looked at her and she quickly turned away so he couldn't see her sorrowful look. He had tried everything to get back to her, his family. He turned back to Vanya who didn't know how to take the last answer. "If you grew old there, you know, in the apocalypse, how come you still look like a kid? And why did Y/n change when you arrived?" Vanya asked as Y/n sat back on the couch. "I told you already. I must've gotten the equations wrong. And I don't know why she changed." He sighed before walking over the the kitchen and grabbing the liquor bottle.

"I mean, Dad always used to say that time travel could mess up your mind. Well, maybe that's what's happening?" Vanya said turning towards him as he poured more of the pink liquid. He sat it down sighing as he walked back to her, "This was a mistake." He said reaching past her to grab his only posession, the eye he had now wrapped in a cloth. "You're too young-too naive to understand." He said walking towards the door. "No Five, Five wait." She said making him pause and look back at her.

"I haven't seen you in a long time and I don't want to lose you again. That's all." She said and Five's eyes drifted to the floor in a manner similar to Y/n's earlier. "And you know what, it's getting late, I have lessons early, and I need sleep, I'm sure you do too." She said walking over to her couch and she quickly layed out the blanket. Five watched as Vanya did this, shocked and debating on staying. "I only have one couch, I'm sorry." Vanya began to apologize but Y/n put a comforting hand on her shoulder with a matching smile. "It's alright, love, you go get some sleep." She said and Vanya nodded before turning to Five. "We'll talk in the morning. I promise." She said and Five nodded silently.