A Hogwarts Intervention

Chapter 11: Ground Rules

"Kill me now," Severus said dramatically with a groan as he resisted the urge to bang his head into the closest hard surface.

"Whatever for?" Dumbledore asked in a combination of amusement and bemusement as he watched the trio of wizards approach the staff table.

"I am not allowing any of them to use potions in the upcoming..." Severus choked on the word reward, failing to actually get it out. Voldemort simply sighed heavily, conjuring another chair and placing it firmly between himself and his irascible human mate so that Harry could have a place to sit as the elves magicked a new place setting into existence.

"Mr. Myrridan? What are you doing? As a student Mr. Potter is required to eat with the rest of the student body," Dumbledore said with a fierce frown of disapproval.

"That was my decision," Severus said sourly, doing his best to stay in character around the uninformed staff members. "I had noticed that he wasn't eating enough and after a brief check realized that he shows signs of starvation for some strange reason. The nutrient potions I assigned are either not doing enough or he isn't taking them. To solve this and avoid whatever idiot keeps slipping him potions that had him screaming for over twelve hours yesterday he will be eating with us for the foreseeable future."

"So that's why," Minerva said softly white with a combination of fury and disgust at whoever had been dosing Harry with unknown potions.

"Yes, that is why none of us were seen yesterday," Severus snarked, returning McGonagall and the rest of the staff to the moment.

"Oh dear, then by all means join us Mr. Potter and don't forget to see Madam Pomfrey after breakfast for a check up," Dumbledore said worriedly, after all he couldn't have his precious weapon destroyed by a simple miscalculation. "Severus, while I would dearly like to hear more on the matter I'm afraid that I am needed at the Ministry shortly. Would you mind terribly writing up the situation, symptoms, and the solution you came up with? I promise to read it and get back to you on the matter when I have the chance."

"Perhaps," Severus said slyly, eyes narrowed in thought. "Of course you will need someone to assist you at the ministry today since you've not solved whatever the problem maybe, might I suggest you take the delightful Professor Umbridge? I will take her classes since no one is going to pay attention today and the students badly need practice time for the spells learned in her class, if she's even taught them anything. In fact why don't the two of you take the next few days and the weekend to sort out whatever has been giving you problems? I promise not to kill, torture, maim or otherwise harm the brats while you're gone."

"But of course, what a delightful suggestion," Dumbledore said cheerily, his eyes murderous since they both knew that there wasn't a way around taking her after the suggestion was made in front of her. The old goat really wanted to kill his spy just now and Severus knew it. Hearing the exchange the rest of the staff decided to dawdle over their own meals and, after Hermione came up to the table to ask something about the charms assignment, the students slowly got the hint. As a result Dumbledore and Umbridge were the first to finish and leave the great hall as the students sat in breathless anticipation.

"Aaaaand they're gone!" Gryffindor crowed from the portrait of the founders as the two passed the edge of the wards. "Right! Everyone put away your things and get into clothing that you don't mind ruining. I'm going to lock down the school while we have our fun."

"Don't you think that's a bit overkill?" Salazar drawled, amusement clear in his tone and mischief dancing in his eyes.

"Considering that the battle royal will add even more power to the castle now that we have a decent amount of magic priming the storage areas... not really," Gryffindor said happily with mock seriousness before shifting to the battle hardened warrior who had defended the school by spell and blade more than once. "I am not letting them back in these walls and we finally have enough magic to enforce the rules that the ministry is breaking on our own lands. The residents of the forest remember and they will stand with us. I will reveal us once more to the muggles if that is what it takes to keep our students safe!"