Wonderland(Alice Cullen)

Talk With Alice/Our First Fight/Bella Wants A Vote

    Hours passed by,and time seemed to stand still,as Alice held me,the scent of her skin making me feel safe and calm. It was a bit after one in the morning,when she finally moved,gently setting me beside her on the bed. Confused,I stared at her,and asked,"What's wrong?" She looked away from me, her face a mask of both pain and guilt. She said,"I have to tell you something,Rowan. And when you hear what I have to say,I'm sure you might like to throw me out of your window,or feel betrayed.." At those words, I began getting scared and worried. "Please..Just tell me." She sighed, and said,"Rowan..I-I can't be with you right now." I felt like I had been stabbed in the heart with a knife, and someone was twisting it slowly. That's how much those words hurt. "What??" She whispered,"When I was gone, Jasper and I..We were together, and..I love him too." I felt like I was drowning, wave after wave of hurt crashing down on me, and I shook my head. "You're lying again. You came back, and you said..Earlier..You-" I couldn't finish the sentence, as my heart kept breaking more and more, until there was almost nothing left.

   Alice took one look at my face, and froze. A look of worry and pain crossed her face, and she said,"Rowan-" I said,"No..You lied to me, Alice. How could you do that?? How could you hold me and tell me you love me, when you..When you don't?" She looked hurt, and said,"Don't say that. I do love you, Rowan. More than anything..But I love him, too." I started shaking, and I saw ice spread across the window, and the walls, and said,"So..You want to be with him? Then go. But you can't fix this..Not this time. As the saying goes..Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me." She begged,"Please, Rowan. Don't do this. Don't shut me out. Don't shut the world out. Not because of me.." I whispered,"But you are my world.." The look on her face when I said that was somewhere between excruciating pain and anger. She said,"I thought you would understand. I didn't choose this.." I stood up, and said,"No. But you could have chosen me." She asked,"So this is it? You're just..Breaking up with me?" As I heard the pain in her voice, I got angry. I said,"No,Alice! You're the one who already broke up with me! Twice!!" I was losing control, as the ice covered my room. I closed my eyes, shaking, and said,"Please..Just go. Go back to him, if that's what you really want."

    She said,"I don't know what I want! I want you, but I also want him, and I've never been so confused.." I said,"I'll help you make that decision..I'm done. You can have Jasper, and I'll leave you alone. I spent months by myself before, and I can do it again." She whispered,"Please..Please don't hate me." I said,"It's too late for that, Alice. But I also love you, and feeling both for you..I can't take this.." She said,"Then don't. Hurt me, yell at me, scream at me. Just do something besides this..You can't keep the pain inside, Rowan. It will kill you." I said,"It already did..Remember?" She looked away from me, and I could see her shaking. She said,"I always thought you were strong, Rowan. But what you're planning to do..That's cowardice." I asked,"What are you talking about?" She said,"I know what you're thinking..About going back to Italy..About finishing what Edward started, and making them kill you. You want to commit suicide.." I asked,"What does it matter to you?" She answered,"Everything..You can't throw your life away because of me. Do you honestly think..I would allow that? I would stop you before you even made it to the airport.." I whispered,"Why? I'm not good enough..He stole your heart away, and there's no way I can get it back."

   She said,"But don't you understand? You both have my heart. I love you..And I can't see you like this. And the vision I saw..Of what you would do to get the Volturi to kill you. It killed me to see that. I watched you die, Rowan." I said,"No,you didn't. Because they won't kill me. I'm already dead. And you're the one holding the knife that cut my heart out." She closed her eyes, then opened them again. "You keep changing plans. You know I can't see what you're going to do if you don't know, either." I said,"But I do know what I'm going to do. And you'll find out later." Alice said,"Before you do anything, you might want to know..Bella is going to my family's house. She wants a vote on her immortality. Would you be against coming with me?" I said,"Yes, but I'll do it anyway." I thawed the ice in my room, and opened the window, leaping down onto the ground below, Alice following me seconds later. I saw Bella and Edward run off, and I silently followed, doing my best to ignore Alice, even as I felt her eyes on me..

(A/N:I know it's a shorter chapter than the others, but the next one will be longer, I promise)