A Second Chance ✔

Eleven

When I opened my eyes, I saw Vanessa directly in front of me.

I yelped and quickly sat up, accidentally bumping our heads together in the process as she was bent over observing me like a creep.

"What were you doing?" I asked, annoyed. Nobody wants to open their eyes and see her face that awfully close.

"Making sure you didn't kill yourself in the last chance."

"I didn't. I killed Jesse! The one who was supposed to die!" I said happily.

"Whoa. You sound awfully happy about it."

"Of course I'll be happy. That prick killed Jake first! Of course I would want to kill him."

"Okay okay, now get up."

I got up and noticed we were at a beach.

"Where are we?"

Vanessa got up and ran along the length of the beach. "Just a little, beautiful part of heaven."

"What?!" I screeched. "Am I dead?!"

Vanessa laughed. "No, silly. You're just in another part of the waiting room. I thought you'd feel gloomy to be in the previous one so I brought you here."

"Oh," I said, feeling pretty stupid. "This is a nice place."

"Jake liked it here too."

"Liked?"

"Yeah. Liked. I don't know if he'll be an angel anymore or not. Because now you did manage to save him."

"But Jesse and Claire saw me."

She nodded. "I know. I saw it too."

"So...what will happen? What next?"

She didn't answer me.

She was wearing a cute floral dress. She looked beautiful in it. I felt a little jealous knowing that Jake had spent the last three years been her friend. I hope nothing happened between them. But it would be so hard for a man to not fall for her. She was so kind and helpful and sweet and everything I wasn't.

I shook my head. Jake loved me. I know it sounds conceited how I was saying it with so much certainty but if he didn't he wouldn't have cried over not being with me. That gave me a little relief.

But I hope Vanessa didn't try anything on him. I mean whenever she talked about him, she would look like a teenage girl having a first crush on someone.

Vanessa suddenly laughed. "You have quite interesting conversations with yourself."

My cheeks burned in embarrassment as I remembered she can hear my thoughts.

"Well did you?"

"What?"

"Did you ever had a crush on Jake?"

"Uh...that depends."

"On what?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Will you kill me if I said I had a teeny tiny crush on him?"

"Funny," I deadpanned.

"Okay but honestly, I had a crush on him," she said slowly and carefully as if expecting me to pounce at her at any moment.

"Had? So no longer now?"

"Yeah, I got over it once I knew he was in love with you."

Hearing that made me feel a lot better. He still loved me even when he went to heaven.

"So why did you help me? I mean if I had a crush on someone I'd be selfish and try to keep the person for myself. I know, I'm evil."

"Well, I guess my feelings for him are selfless. If I truly like someone I'd want them to be happy and will do anything in my power to make them happy."

I narrowed my eyes at her. "Did you just subtly tell me that I don't truly love him?"

"Uh...n-no I didn't." Vanessa stammered.

Yes, she did.

I sat on the sand, facing the beach. After some time, she took a seat next to me.

"Vanessa, I know you think I don't truly love him. But I know I do. If I didn't truly love him, I wouldn't have cared much when he died. Three years later, I still did not get over that night. I still did not get over losing Jake. All my life, I've only lost. Even if I did get something, it would get snatched away from me in the most brutal ways. I've made many wrong decisions in my life and I've learnt from it but I know my friends and Jake couldn't be anymore right in my life. Having those people in my life was most probably the only thing I did right. But then I lost them too, one by one. I first lost Jake due to which I pushed the others away from me."

"Why did you push the others away?" She asked curiously.

"Because whenever I looked at them, I relived that night over and over again. I didn't want to face it. Especially when I looked at Brooke, those events just come flooding in my mind. I wanted to block them. So I pushed everyone away from me. Now that God had finally given me a chance to get those people back, I didn't want to waste it. So forgive me, Vanessa, because my love for Jake couldn't be more selfish. I know he deserves someone better than me because he has only lost things and even his life after meeting me. But I'm selfish. So if I get him, I won't let him go."

We were quiet for a long time before she finally sighed. "Don't worry. He loves you back. And so I'm happy for the both of you."

"Thank you."

Vanessa was really nice, the kind of girl I'd love to be friends with. Too bad she was dead. But the least I can do was hope she'd be given a chance to live again. I don't know if this worked here in heaven but I really hope an angel is listening to me right now and helps me in bringing her back.

She suddenly looked at me and I could see the gratitude in her eyes. She smiled at me and unexpectedly pulled me in a hug. She didn't need to thank me with words because her eyes and touch were enough for her to convey that to me.

"Anyways," she said, getting up and dusting off her backside. "I think it's almost time you return to...whatever that is decided for you."

"Wait, what did you mean when you said that the three chances will merge into one to cover up...uh, the mistake. I didn't quiet understand that."

"It means that what had happened in the past will repeat, just not with you. So out there in a parallel universe, a different but same version of you will lose Jake again, Brian will survive, what had happened to you till now will be repeated exactly like that. This has happened before. You are the result of the same mistake a different Claire committed in her three chances."

"So the cycle will continue? What will happen to me now?"

Vanessa smiled brightly at me. "Let's keep that a surprise, yeah?"

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