gilded » david dobrik au

three

After settling my differences with Todd, I moved on to Zane.

Well, technically, Zane came to me. I was outside gardening with my grandma, completely oblivious to my surroundings, when he showed up in my driveway. She went inside, and Zane and I went on a walk down to the courtyard at the center of my neighborhood to talk.

"Me and Heath broke up," he told me first, after a minute of walking in awkward silence. "The first day of summer. He, um... was not happy about how you found out about David."

"You didn't tell me. Todd did," I said, and after a few seconds of Zane struggling to find the words, I added, "but that sucks. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry," he countered with a troubled sigh. "I fucked up a million times, Mona. I shouldn't have left you when I did, and I should've told you about David as soon as I found out. I don't know... I guess I've just felt this loyalty to Heath and Kristen and Liza for so long."

"Why?" I asked, taking a seat on the cement bench at the corner of the courtyard.

"All the kids at Abernathy have gone to the same private schools their whole life, pretty much. I've known them since I went to preschool at Hillside Church. I think... I mean, I know it's no excuse for anyone, but we all had loyalties that lied with the other Abernathy kids. We've been through everything together," he said. "I know it's not an excuse. I fucked up big time, and I seriously apologize for it. It's just an explanation. I didn't want them to post that video, so I told you."

"... What video?"

"Oh, fuck. I thought you knew."

I, in fact, did not know.

It turns out that, allegedly, there was a video of Gabbie and David kissing. Zane had never seen the video, but Liza swore on her life it was real. Whether it was taken before or after we'd been officially dating, I had no clue. Whether it was even real at all, I had no clue. All I knew is that Liza and Kristen were going to tweet it on the last day of school, and by Todd telling me, I beat them to the punch.

Though Zane wasn't technically the one who spilled the big secret, at the time, he thought he was. He confessed and was exiled from the group. The kids at Abernathy don't take betrayal lightly.

Ironic, considering none of them seemed to have any issue betraying me. Hmm.

It honestly didn't take much for me to forgive Zane. I had to think about it from his perspective, and as much as I told myself I would've informed my former friend of her cheating boyfriend, the truth is that I probably wouldn't. It was a dick move, but we were in high school. We follow orders. Most of us didn't have the balls to make the orders.

Luckily for us, I did.

The week before senior year started, I met with Todd and Zane at Plato's. I needed to be sure that they had my back, and be sure that they both understood the plan. It would be painful if it went down the wrong way.

After careful consideration, I decided Todd and I would not be fake dating for our return to school. If I was being completely honest, I had forgiven him, but I hadn't forgotten what he'd done. He wasn't to be trusted, and I wasn't in the state of mind to pretend that I was in love with him when even smiling at him was a challenge. I didn't need a boyfriend to hurt David anyways. I just needed myself.

I reasoned that if I could be myself when we got back to Abernathy—walk the halls the way I used to, act like I was unbothered by everything, act like nothing had ever happened— if I could do all that, I would win.

I wasn't sure exactly how it would work, but with Zane and Todd's approval, I figured it was worth a shot.

The last step in my school preparation was my day-before crying session with Giselle and Everleigh on facetime. They sat there while I heaved and shook and talked for hours on end.

"It's just not fair, guys," I repeated for what was probably the tenth time that hour. "All men do is take. They take your time, they take your freedom, they take your love, they take your compassion and your energy and your happiness, they take your virginity, and what do they give? Absolutely nothing."

"We know, Mona."

"They are so damn selfish. They are theirs, and you are theirs, and everything is theirs, and nothing is yours!" I cried, wiping the tears off my puffy cheeks. "And you know, you gladly give it. All you want is to feel loved, and to feel important, and to feel like you matter to them. You give everything, but even everything is not enough. All they want is more."

"We know, pretty girl," Giselle lightly smiled. "Men are selfish and weak. They need constant ego boosts, and they look for them in women. You know what the great thing is, though?"

"What?" I half whined, resting my head on top of my wet and shaking knee.

"You do not, and will not, ever need a man for anything. You will never have to settle. You will never be forced to give anything anymore. All you need is yourself, Mona. You are smart and brave and kind and talented. All you will ever need in life is yourself. That's the upside. It's not 1950 anymore; we don't need men for shit."

Armed with that peptalk, I made my way into Abernathy Prepatory, ready to make David Dobrik's life a living hell.

I watched assassination nation and mother! in preparation for writing this book. Mentally in a men aint shit state. Please dm me (or comment) ur thoughts on either if uve seen them!!! Both are amazing imo!!'

Xoxo abby

Also this is shorter than my usual chaps, but i really wanted to end it here and i didnt really feel like i could add anywhere else