Agent Vermont (Red Vs Blue OC)

Season 8 Episode 13

I watched, bored and annoyed, as we all stood around Tex, just staring.

"I'm waking her up." Church said.

"No way buddy. You must have missed the smashfest we just went through. I ain't repeating that." Sarge said.

'Ya, you guys really got your asses handed to ya.' I thought, glaring at Tex. It wasn't even the Tex I knew, it was the one Epsilon created. The Tex I knew died when the pelican crashed into Valhalla.

"Hey, we made a deal: I unlock you, you have to help me with her." Church said.

'I don't remember that deal.' Tau said.

'Ya, neither do I.' I thought.

"Hey, now hold on a second." Grif said.

"This affects the entire group. I say we put it to a vote. All those in favor of waking her up and letting her kill us, say Aye." Simmons said.

"Aye. Caboose? Mutey?" Church asked.

I smacked the back of Church's head and gave a thumbs down.

"Uh, Church, I believe that means no." Simmons said.

Church huffed.

"Caboose?" He said.

"Present." Caboose said.

"No, we're not doing that. Just say aye." Church said, sounding a bit frustrated.

"You. Oops I mean me!" Caboose said.

"No; Aye." Church repeated, getting more frustrated.

"Church." Caboose said.

"Just say Aye." Church said, getting really annoyed now.

"Oh, I get it, right, sorry. My left eye or my right eye?" Caboose asked.

I nearly snorted. Caboose, you are the best.

"He votes yes." Church said for him.

"I would also like it noted I was present." Caboose said.

"Okay. And everyone in favor of not doing that thing and leaving her asleep and not getting killed by the person we're not going to wake up because nobody is that stupid, say Nay." Sarge said, confusing the carp out of me with his wording.

"That was like a, quadruple negative." Simmons said.

"Just vote." Sarge said.

"Nay?" Simmons asked.

"I didn't even understand the question, so I'm just gonna say Blueberry." Grif said.

"Fuck it, veto, she comes out. So Sheila, is there any way to turn her, only you know, partway back on?" Church called to FLISS. I rolled my eyes.

'I find this situation funny to watch I particularly do not want to feel your pain, thank you very much.' Tau said as I slowly began backing up.

"No, I am sorry. I can either leave her in lock, or take her out of lock. There is no in between." FLISS said.

"So she's either completely asleep, or full-on bitch. Sounds like my ex-wife." Tucker said.

"You were married?" Caboose asked.

"Haw-ha- gross, I hope not." Tucker said.

I smacked Tucker particularly hard on the back of the head.

"OW! What the fuck!" Tucker said.

I signed, 'Don't be an ass and maybe I won't hit you.'

"Fine, Fine! Geez, why are you always hitting me?!" Tucker asked.

'Because you act like an ass.' I signed.

"Fine, you win, Mutey. Fuck, my neck hurts." Tucker said, rubbing it.

'You deserve it.' I signed.

"Well, we have to do something." Church said.

"Why do people always say that; we have to do something? We don't have to do anything. Let's just let sleeping maniacs lie." Grif said.

"Here, let me try this." Church said.

I watched him leave his body and go to Tex. We all stood around, waiting for a while. I think we all feared Tex's reaction because we had all backed up.

Then Church re-appeared.

"What did she say?" Tucker asked.

"Okay, I think we got it all worked out." Church said.

"She cool?" Grif asked.

"As cool as she ever was." Church replied.

"That does not inspire confidence in me." Grif said.

'I think I agree with Grif.' I thought.

'Same.' Tau responded.

"Wake her up Sheila." Church called.

"Affirmative." FLISS called.

"Back up, back up." Simmons whispered.

"Ending Recovery mode, all units." FLISS said.

"Uh, how're you feeling?" Church asked.

Tex punches Tucker in the face, but not as hard as I expected.

"Ow!" Tucker yelled, stumbling back.

"Better now." Tex said.

"What the fuck? What with you women and beating me up?!" Tucker yelled.

"Your lucky Mutey already hit you or else I would have knocked you out in my annoyance." Tex said, looking at me.

I shrugged.

"Oh right. I forgot to mention one thing." Church said.

'Oh, you totally 'forgot' to mention that, Epsilon. I really doubt that you did.' Tau thought.