Heal My Scars (A Lapidot Dystopia) (ON HIATUS)

VI-Peridot

"Morning, Dot!" Jasper called when I walked into the kitchen. Lapis came up behind me, rubbing her eyes from so much sleep. "How do you do, Blue?" Jasper asked, grinning at her rhyme.

"Rested," Lapis answered, "but also tired. I think I somehow managed to get a bit too much sleep."

"I made those waffles for you," Jasper said, still smiling.

"You did?" Lapis asked, walking to see the waffles. "Wow! They really are shaped like New York!"

Jasper chuckled at Lapis's reaction as she took a waffle and walked back to her seat. Then her gaze shifted to me.

"Aren't you gonna have one?" She asked.

"Yeah," I answered, "I just have...a lot on my mind right now."

Jasper sighed as she closed the waffle iron to cook another waffle. "I know all that happened has been bugging you," she said. "It always has, but I promise you. Your life will get better. You're going to make it to eighteen, and you're going to live a happy life."

"How do you know?" I asked. "I nearly got caught by an Accordie...what if I get caught later?"

"You should just stay," Jasper answered. "Stay here with me. You won't have to worry about that."

"I don't want to put you in danger," I said. "You're harboring a stray, and the longer I stay here, the more trouble you're going to be in."

"I know," Jasper replied, "but I want to help you. You should stay as long as you need to."

She gently took my face into one of her large hands, and I felt a tear drip down my cheek. Jasper sighed and gestured toward the living room.

"You need some space," she said, "go cool off for a little bit. I'll still be here with Lapis. Don't worry."

I looked down as I walked away, hoping to hide my face from Lapis. The feelings inside of me were all too much. I needed to let it all out.

As I sat down on the bed, the memories began to return in flashes. The image of them staring at me, glaring. The image of my arms and hands covered in scrapes drenched with fresh blood. The image of the door slamming shut, sealing my path.

I heard quiet little footsteps behind me, and I forced myself to quiet down. I held my breath to keep back the sobs. I didn't need to be seen like this. It wasn't like me.

"Peridot?" It was Lapis's voice, quiet and filled with worry.

"What?" I whispered, pinching the skin on my arm to help distract me from the situation.

I didnt't expect Lapis to walk up behind me, her arms around me, and lay her head on my back, but she did. Suddenly, my control over my emotions left me, and my tears fell onto her hands.

"Sorry, sorry," I whispered, desperately trying to wipe away my tears.

"Don't apologize," Lapis responded. "What happened to you?" I could tell she was beginning to blush. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I'm just...worried about you."

"I don't know if I can say it," I said, "It's such a hard thing to talk about for me. It even took me a long time to tell Jasper. I-I don't know."

"I understand," Lapis whispered. "Ever since I got out of the orphanage...I've been trying to leave it behind, but no matter how hard I try, it's always there in my mind. It never leaves. It's a part of me that I never wanted."

I didn't reply because I was trying to keep the rest of my tears away. My stomach was hurting from hunger and the stress.

"But you don't have to talk about it," Lapis said. "It's not my business. It never has been," I felt her pull away, "and you've made that clear."