Seventh Horcrux

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The bell rang, and everyone froze while Dobby went to answer the door.

Voldemort gave Lucius a stern look. "I didn't know you'd planned for any visitors... While your Lord is planning the conquest of the wizarding world..."

"Of course not, my Lord," Lucius replied, bowing deeply. "Perhaps Narcissa just forgot to tell her friends for tea that-"

He could see Narcissa scowling. Still, better a week on the couch than a Crucio. Particularly when Draco was present. The boy - young man, already! - was his pride and joy, but his enthusiasm for receiving the mark had dropped considerably ever since he'd witnessed Lucius soiling his robes while he was writhing on the floor under his Lord's wand. The youth of today... Lucius resisted the urge to shake his head.

He was distracted from his deliberations when his house elf returned. "Dobby is back with Master Sirius Black, sir!"

"Crucio!"

Lucius winced as as Sirius leapt out of the way of Bellatrix' curse and took cover behind a stack of 17th century china.

"Is that how you greet your beloved cousin and fellow Death Eater, Bella?" He spread his arms. "I know these robes and masks aren't the cuddliest things, but still... Hugs?"

Seeing Sirius' puppy-eye look, Lucius suddenly felt the strange need to pet his cousin in law. That, or kick him. He wasn't sure.

Bellatrix was firmly on the latter side of the spectrum, though. "Avada Kedavra!"

The china shattered.

Voldemort raised his hand, beckoning the pair to stop. "Now, now, Bella... Playing with your cousin is fine. But no killing. The Daily Prophet wrote he's my right-hand man, and I'd rather not lose his services."

"But I'm your right hand man!"

Lucius shook his head. Though, he doubted Bellatrix and Rodolphus had ever even reached first base. Maybe Bellatrix was simply unaware of some basic anatomical facts.

"Well, anyway..." Sirius dusted some powdered china off his robes. "I'd escaped Azkaban a while ago, but now I'm back to serve you, Vol-" Sirius yelped, and Lucius saw Severus tucking away his wand. "-my Lord. And I'm once again ready to serve you as your faithful spy, the legacy of the entire Black family vouching for my loyalty."

Voldemort narrowed his already slit-like eyes. "I only recall having one spy, Mr Black."

"Ah, but Peter hasn't returned, has he, my Lord? Doubtlessly a double agent. I on the other hand, am such a great spy, I even pretend I like muggle contraptions like the motorcycle I've parked in Narcissa's flowerbeds to mislead the old fool Dumbledore."

"Crucio!"

Sirius jumped out of the way again, and looked hurt at his other cousin. "Um... Sorry, Cissy?"

"Crucio!"

It was so nice to see sisters doing things together, even after a decade of forcibly living apart. Nothing quite like family.

Sirius had transformed into a large, black dog, and was now giving Narcissa his best expression of sad puppy eyes. It didn't work, and she raised her wand again, only to be stopped by the Dark Lord. Demurely, she lowered her hand, its grip threatening to snap her wand in two.

"Very well..." Voldemort said. "Your loyalty to the cause shall be rewarded. So, let us discuss our imperiusing campaign against the... Surviving..." He shot Bellatrix a look. "Members of the Ministry..."