Taylor. My Name's James Taylor

III

   As far as I was concerned, death hurt. I felt the pain of my previous injuries and many new ones. Every once in a while I would catch a glimpse of light and hope that I would eventually feel weightless and start floating to it, but it never happened. I can hear the buzz of voices in my ears but I can't actually make out any of the words that they're saying. I can hear screaming too but I eventually fade back into the peaceful pleasant darkness.

I arrived at a place of confusion. I didn't know if I was awake or dreaming. I couldn't tell if this was reality or another fantasy. I didn't know if I was alive or dead and I'm sure that if what really happened actually happened, I better continue to enjoy ever breath that comes out of my body because I am positive it will be my last. I carefully opened my eyes a crack to get a decent view of my surroundings. The first thing I saw was the many tubes running from my body to different machines. As I continued my scanning, I found Mom sitting on the nearest sofa sleep against Dad's shoulder. I could see the worry lines on their faces and I felt guilty because I was the one who put them there. I finished my scan and concluded that nobody else was in the room. Confession time was now or never.

"Mom. Dad." I said with a very hoarse voice. Both of their eyes snapped open and they were at my bedside at once.

"Oh, James! My baby! I'm so glad you're okay." Mom said brushing some stray strands of hair out of my face and grasping my hand.

"It's okay Mom. I'm okay." I said trying to see how long they would hold out before asking the dreaded question.

"That's great, Baby! And it's also great that we're already in a hospital in case I may happen to seriously injure you even worse than you already are!" Mom said starting with the caring mother voice and moving to the 'You-better-have-a-really- good- explanation- as-to-why-we're-here-in-the-first-place' voice. At least I didn't have to wait very long for the question to be asked. Now what will be an acceptable answer? The only thing I could think of was telling them the whole story while leaving out certain parts so that I wouldn't put either of my siblings in the sinking boat that I was presently in.

"Okay, so I kinda forgot about the whole grounded thing and I wanted to go out for a walk. I don't know what really happened and I somehow ended up going over to... uhh... a friend's house." I started, doing my best to leave out any names or to put in any details.

"Then it ended up getting kind of late and I feel asleep over at their house. I woke up this morning around five or so and happened to read the texts that had been sent on my phone. I didn't actually remember sending them because I had been so tired that I was basically sleep texting. Then, when I realized the time and remembered that I was grounded, I asked my friend could they take me home and they said they would. And while we driving to the house a dog ran out into the middle of the street and my friend swerved to avoid it and we ran into a tree. That's all I remember." I said proud of myself for not giving away any unnecessary information.

Mom and Dad both looked at each other.

"That's not what the police or doctors said happened, James. So, why don't you fill in all of the parts of that little story that you skipped over because we already have a pretty good idea of what's missing." Dad said, speaking for the first time.

I looked at both of my parents and took a deep, painful breath.

"Okay, fine." And I told them the entire story except for the part about Jordan dropping me off and Johnnie forgetting to come and pick me up. By the end of the story, Mom was crying and Dad's face was one of disbelief. And then Dad asked the one question that everyone wanted to know.

"Why?" And I just looked away because even I didn't have an answer for that.

            Sometime later, the doctor came in to visit me. He told me that I was lucky to have made it out of that car wreck alive and with just a few of broken bones. My already bruised ribs are cracked but should heal quickly and my left arm bone is bruised and I have a bandage covering my head where the doctor said that there was a long, but not deep gash across my forehead. By this point though, I had become more concerned about Alex now than anything else. No one had mentioned him and they all just ignored my questions when I asked about him and my mind kept wandering to the unthinkable. 

"Um, excuse me sir? I was wondering if you could tell me anything about my friend that was in the car with me."

The doctor just looked at me for a while and then finally decided how he would answer.

"Son, I think it's best that you come and see for yourself." The doctor responded, coming over to help me out of the bed. I had been allowed to walk around the room since my legs were perfectly fine, but no one ever let me go anywhere else. I also didn't like having to be in a dress very much; however I learned that I would have to keep it on until I was checked out of the hospital. Nevertheless, they were able to unhook me from all of the machines so it was just me, this dress, and my bandages walking down the hall beside the doctor.  When we reached Alex's door a few minutes later, I was scared of what I might find in the room.  Would it be a body completely covered by a blanket, or a gauze wrapped person so completely covered that they resembled a mummy, or would I fine a healthy undamaged boy smiling and ready to be released. And when the doctor finally pushed open the door, I had the answer to my question. D. None of the above.

            Alexander Keith Samsung had completely lost his left eye and everything below his right knee. His right arm and collarbone was broken but thankfully still intact. Alex was sitting up in his bed being spoon fed by a woman I had never seen before. She looked a lot like Alex's little brother. Dark brown hair and eyes, slim, small figure, slightly tanned skin, and she was about my height. The only difference between Pry, Alex's little brother, and their mother is that Pry has big, green eyes. Mr. Samsung, or Mr. Sammy as he likes to be called, is a tall, muscular, dark skinned man. He is very intimidating by his looks and you could easily tell that money wasn't a problem based on the way he dressed. Mr. Sammy is the CEO of Samsung Electronics. Mr. Sammy is slightly taller than Johnnie and he has intelligent brown eyes. His naturally unruly hair has been cut down evenly to exactly two centimeters off his scalp. His teeth always have been perfectly straight and always white. And his attire consists of a navy blue long sleeve dress shirt, khaki slacks, and shiny brown dress shoes. Mr. Sammy was the first to see me and immediately stood up as I walked in the room.

"James." Was all the greeting I received from him which made both Alex and his mom look up at me.

"Hey, Jamie. What's up? Nobody would tell me how you were?" Alex said cheerfully, even with all his injuries and new disabilities.

"I'm fine Alex. They wouldn't tell me how you were either so I had to come down here and see you for myself. I'm sorry about all this. I guess it really was my fault." I said, confessing in front of anyone who was listening.

"What'r you talkin' 'bout Jamie? If anything, this is all my fault." Alex said locking his eye with mine so he wouldn't have to see the shock on his parents face. "I was the one who was driving, and I was the one who got those drinks." It seemed as if Alex was confessing too, but he just needed me here to help him through it.

"W-what do you mean, Son?" Mr. Sammy questioned.

"I mean that when Jamie came over to play some games..." Alex started.

"What baby? What happened?" His mother franticly asked.

"I-I... I can't remember."

"What?"

"I don't remember! I just remember Jamie coming over and us playing some games and I remember waking up from the accident, but I don't remember anything in between! Jamie! Do you remember?" Alex asked me. His one eye looking at me desperately. I thought back to when he was talking about and I came up blank. I thought harder about what had happened and found out that I remembered even less than I did when I explained the story to my parents. I can't remember anything that happened from the time I woke up to waking up thinking about my mixed vision.

            "No. I don't remember either. I had when I had first woke up and now it's gone." I said, starting to panic slightly.

            "You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone. Close the door on the past. You don't try to forget the mistakes, but you don't dwell on it. You don't let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space. A quote from Johnny Cash. Maybe it's better that you two don't remember what happened and you shouldn't spend time and energy trying to remember." says Mr. Sammy.

The saying seemed to soothe Alex but for me it seemed as if the temperature in the room dropped forty degrees at what thought popped in my head. It was always something my social studies teachers would say but it didn't mean anything to me then, it does now though.

"Those who don't remember history... are doomed to repeat it."