Feels Right (Binu Fanfiction)

09 | I Know What You Mean

And just as agreed, the following morning, everything was the same. Bin didn't treat Dongmin any differently, their friendship hadn't faltered after the night's antics, and Dongmin didn't make a move on him.

Bin didn't feel eyes on him in the shower, nor did he feel the need to check. And when he stepped out of the bathroom with a towel around his hips to look for clean clothes, Dongmin was reading his book, commenting something about the main character that made Bin laugh.

It was almost as if nothing at all had happened last night. The sun continued its rise and descent over the sky like any other day. Dongmin's family left to go skiing, and nobody seemed to have heard any suspicious noises from Dongmin and Bin's room, or if they had, they didn't bring it up.

It wasn't until after lunch, when they had gone down to the pool. Bin was again sitting with his feet in the water watching Dongmin swim laps like a dolphin that he realised that something was different.

He couldn't put his finger on it at first, he just had a creeping feeling that everything was a lie, that the perfect façade had to crumble eventually, though why, he had no idea.

There was nothing about Dongmin that seemed off, Bin thought with a smile as he watched him tap the far end of the pool and turn around, swimming back the way he came. And then a thought struck him, clear as day, yet it had taken him quite some time to even consider it.

What made this morning feel so odd wasn't that anything had changed between them, but rather that nothing had.

Shouldn't something be different? After all, Bin was a straight man, and not only had Dongmin sucked him off last night, Bin had returned the favour with a handjob that he couldn't lie to himself and say that only Dongmin had enjoyed.

It should be natural that something changed, Bin would have feel at least some small amount of apprehension. And in truth, it was that distinct lack of awkwardness that made Bin feel like things weren't the way they should be.

He was startled out of his thoughts when Dongmin whooped victoriously, climbing up the ladder and exclaiming that he'd beaten his best time from yesterday. Bin smiled proudly at him in congratulation.

And just like that, everything fell into places.

Bin wanted to see Dongmin happy, wanted to spend the rest of his life with him, wanted to hold him and tell him everything would be okay when he was sad, and none of these were new thoughts that had popped into his head overnight, they were feelings he'd harboured for years, but never quite pinpointed until now, simply because there had been no need to.

Dongmin sat down next to Bin, raising his palm with that stupid, big grin of his, and Bin obliged with his silent request for a high five. Their palms touched, and instead of pulling his hand back as usual, Bin let it linger, closing his fingers around Dongmin's, smiling at the confused look Dongmin shot him.

He leaned closer, brushing his nose against Dongmin's, closing his eyes as he pressed their lips together in what had to be the most chaste kiss he'd given since high school.

Dongmin's lips tasted faintly of chlorine, they were plush and soft against Bin's, and he didn't think a simple kiss had ever felt this satisfying. He already missed it when he pulled back, a soft blush tinting his cheeks, smiling at a surprised and disoriented Dongmin.

“Why?” he asked, to which Bin only shrugged, looking down at their joined hands that had drifted into Dongmin's lap, rubbing his thumb in slow circles on Dongmin's skin.

“It felt right,” he said simply, glancing up at Dongmin and nudging him with the tip of his nose. “This, being with you. It feels right.”

Dongmin's expression of disbelief softened into one of comprehension and warmth, and he draped the arm that wasn't being held hostage by Bin around his shoulders, pulling him closer until he could rest his forehead against his.

“I think I know what you mean.”