More Than Friends | Albus x Scorpius

Part Twenty-Six: Christmas Wish

Albus stayed in his room every day for the next three days. Every day, three times a day, his mother would knock at his locked door and ask, "Albus, do you want any food? Something to drink?"

He would respond to his mother with silence. James would come to his door and ask, "Albus, please open your door. Mum might lose it."

Albus was silent.

"Al, "

Albus closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He felt so tired, yet he slept all day. He saw the deep bags under his eyes every time he looked in the mirror and he looked pale, his cheeks a little hollow and his lips were chapped. He knew he was hungry, though he also knew that if he ate, he would be sick and vomit.

"Al, just unlock the door, " James continued in a hurt tone of voice.

Albus replied, almost yelling, "Fuck off, James!"

Albus heard James respond, "Albus, you can't stay in there and not eat. You've gotta eat, man."

Albus ignored his older brother and got out of his bed, walking to his desk and petting his owl. She pushed her head into his hand and hooted once. Maybe she knew how sad Albus was. Or maybe she was just an owl and had no comprehension of human emotions.

Maybe Albus was going crazy. He was so tired. Albus felt like he was alone, which he was.

Scorpius,
I wish you a Merry Christmas. I'll be sending this owl with your present. I love you, but I might have to break my promise soon, though I won't say what it is in this letter, just in case my damned father intercepts this.
Love,
Albus

Albus sealed the letter and got the stationary kit that he had bought from Scrivenshafts in Hogsmeade. He wrapped it messily in blue wrapping paper that he had swiped a few days ago. He wrote Scorpius' full name on it in big, blocky letters.

"Take this directly to Scorpius and give him a good hoot, " he told his owl. She hooted at him. "Don't let Dad see this."

He tied it to the owl's leg and opened the window, shivering slightly at the cold breeze. He closed the window when the owl was a speck in the distance, he then heard someone knock on his door and he rushed to close and latch the window, hiding the open photo album under a stack of books on his desk. He looked at his calendar and made a mental note: Christmas Day --- two days.

"Albus? Mum wants us all to come downstairs to make The Wish."

'The Wish' was something Harry and Ginny did with Albus when he was little after he had cried about his Christmas wish not coming true. James was five when this happened, so he also participated in making one special wish that they wanted with all of their hearts. It became a sort of a tradition, Lily usually asking for popular Muggle books, James asking for something mad like a pet Phoenix, and Albus asking for something practical. Last year, he asked for new school robes.

Albus opened the door, causing James to jump slightly. "Did...did you hear me?"

Albus nodded and said in a slightly hoarse voice, tender because he hadn't spoken to anybody in days, "Yeah, you can go tell Mum and Dad that I wish to not be here."

He made to shut the door before James stuck his shoe between the door and frame. "Al, just try to talk to them again. Maybe ---"

"Maybe what, James? Maybe they'll let me be with Scorpius outside of Hogwarts? I know you and Lily were eavesdropping on the entire thing and it wasn't exactly calm. You heard everything Dad said to me."

"Albus, please, " James begged, clasping his hands together. "I can't stand you being in here all alone, not eating, and being hurt."

"I'm not hurt, "

"Sad, then."

Albus replied, "Not sad, either."

He slammed the door in his brother's face, feeling angry that James had the audacity to tell him how Albus was feeling. Albus got on top of his covers and laid down on his stomach, putting his hood over his head, turning his head and looking at the setting sun.

No, he didn't feel sad. He wasn't angry. He was completely numb. He could hear everything going on downstairs; his sister and dad laughing. His mother and brother talking about whatever he had wished for.

Slowly, Albus felt fatigue settle in his body, his eyelids slowly closing and his breathing steady.

It felt like he had only been asleep for a second when he felt his bed dip as someone sat at the foot of it. Albus halfway opened one eye and saw that his entire room was dark except the moonlight pouring in through his window.

"I'm so sorry, " Albus heard the all too familiar voice of his mother say from at the foot of his bed. Albus kept his breathing normal and steady and acted as if he were still asleep, which was believable given the fact that Albus was normally a pretty heavy sleeper.

"I didn't think that this would happen. I saw how happy you were when Scorpius was here and James told me before you came back what you had told him in Ron's shop."

Albus resisted the urge to grip his blankets in anger. He told James to not tell Mum or Dad before he, Albus, could.

"Now you're so sad and not eating anything..."

"Not sad, " Albus murmured into his pillow.

Ginny placed her hand on her son's arm, which Albus pushed away.

"Then what are you, Albus?"

Albus shrugged and said nothing. His mother was silent for a few minutes. Albus suddenly felt his chest cave and a sob escaped his mouth. He sat up to get air when another gut-wrenching sob escaped his mouth, tears spilling from his eyes and falling onto the floor. Albus could feel himself shaking but he couldn't stop it no matter how hard he was trying.

"Mum, why is the door..." James started from the doorway before trailing off as he saw his brother sobbing and Ginny trying to console him. Ginny stood and tried to get Albus to calm down before James waved his hand at her, gesturing for her to come out and speak to him.

"James, I don't know what to do. He's so sad, "

James shook his head and said, "He's not sad. He's hurt, Mum."

"He's going to hurt himself he keeps trying to hide his feelings."

James agreed and pointed out, "We didn't have that problem before his third year at Hogwarts." Ginny nodded and whiled a tear from her eye, tortured on the inside that her eldest son knew more about Albus than she did.

"Did you see the two of them at the Wizards Wheezes?" Ginny asked.

James thought for a moment before responding, "At first, I thought they were just talking to each other. Uncle Ron thought that too before he went to speak to them. Albus looked so happy when Scorpius laughed at something he whispered in his ear."

Ginny nodded.

"A few students moved and I saw the two of them holding hands and when Ron went up to them, Albus looked strong on the outside, but he was scared. But he smiled for Scorpius. I think he tries to be as strong as possible around Scorpius."

Ginny looked back into Albus' room and saw her son lying on his bed, his body shaking slightly.

"I think so, too."

James left his mother and brother, tears stinging his eyes as he turned away and walked quietly to his room.

"Albus? What do you want the most for Christmas?" Ginny asked. She expected silence from her reserved son but was surprised when she got an answer in a steady voice.

"To be with Scor...him and nobody to hate us. Just us...together..."