chapter three: you're a star

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max and eleven sat at a table in the food court, max wringing her hands as eleven grew impatient

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max and eleven sat at a table in the food court, max wringing her hands as eleven grew impatient.

"who is starling?" she had asked.

"she's.. not who you think she is." max gnawed on her bottom lip, "she's this great person one second, and the next her friends are calling you maxi-pad as she stands idly by."

eleven's eyes softened, and made a mental reminder to ask hopper what a maxi-pad was later.

"she's just..." max sighed. she had no idea how to explain who starling was.

when max had first moved to hawkins, starling was the one to show her around school since she was a year above her grade. she was nice to max, she was funny and she even offered max a stick of gum. max thought this girl was going to be her next best-friend, until lunch rolled around. starling and her stuck up friends were walking down the hallway as max skated down the opposite side. she almost waved at star as she rode past, but she didn't get the chance as she was hurled down onto the floor.

max knew her friend had tripped her. she can't forget starling's cold stare casted at max when she was on the floor. starling hadn't even bothered trying to help her up. she only walked off with her friends.

the days after that were endless name-callings and starling never made an effort to stop them. sometimes, starling would try to make conversation with the red-head but max always walked off.

eventually, starling wore her down and they talked. they began to be friends in secret, but never in school. starling would hang out with max almost everyday if she wasn't with her friends and they would have fun together.

but max got tired of it, and they stopped talking near the end of the second semester. she only talked to starling around the boys, because the boys constantly snuck into the movies through starlings work.

eleven sighed at this story, having a newfound understanding of who starling was. she didn't want to believe max, but she knew max would never lie to el. friend's don't lie.

"i'm sorry max." eleven stared at her hands on the table, "i didn't know."

"i know, and it's okay. i just had to tell you before you go off and make googly eyes at this girl. i'm not saying you should hate her, but you should know that she isn't this perfect image that you probably think of her as."

"i don't like her."

"you do, i know you do. you look at her like you used to look at mike." max smiled, "be careful, el."

"i will. after hearing this, i'm not so sure about how i feel about her. i think i just need to talk to her." eleven smiled, reaching over to hold max's hand, "but don't worry, i'll make her spill a drink on herself or something."

max laughed, throwing her head back. eleven merely giggled. once max was calmed down, she stood up and eleven stood up with her.

"ice cream is finished, conversation was had, now let's go get you some outfits. if it's not for mike, then let's make starling see what she's missing." max smiled devilishly before pulling eleven and running through the mall with her.

eleven felt the newfound feeling again, recklessness. she finally knew what it was like to be young and free with max, and she was grateful to have such a caring friend like her. she decided she would worry about starling later.

----

"robin," starling sighed, sitting up from her previous laying-down position on the table in the back, "do you think i'm a bad person?"

robin snorted before answering, "yes. why?"

starling threw her empty cup at her sister.

"oh come on, be serious." she said, her shoulder rising above the other as she leaned her head to the side and swung her legs back and forth.

"i think you're a good person, you just don't show it." robin answered, going to stand in front of the insecure girl, "take your friends for example-"

"what does francis and kate have to do with anything?" she furrowed her eyebrows as she sat up straighter.

"they're horrible people, ar. they're like the epitome of highschool mean girls." robin scoffed as she walked backwards to lean against the wall.

"they're nice to me."

"yeah, to you. and they're only nice to you because you got hot after middle-school and every guy is pining after you. they're feeding off all the attention that's on you, star." she explained. she sighed for her little sister, wishing things turned out differently for her.

"don't you dare say it." she glared at robin, who looked at her in confusion.

"say what?"

"oh.. i thought you were going to make a pun about how i'm a star, or something." starling shrugged, hopping off the table and pacing around the room.

"yeah, well you have my input. why do you ask?" robin says, "you having a crisis there?"

"i think i like el." starling confesses.

"okay.. and?"

"and i feel like i'm not good enough for her. i barely know her, but i know she's pure and wholesome and she's so damn cute and soft. i'm going to hurt her, rob." her arm was draped across her stomach as her elbow was placed upon it, her thumb in between her teeth.

"everybody has their demons star. i doubt she's this good girl that you see her as." robin shrugged, "it's the nice ones you always have to look out for."

"i can't see jane doing anything bad."

"who the hell is jane?"

starling sighed, "nevermind."

-----

later that night, starling laid in her bed and stared at her ceiling. her fingers were laced together on top of her stomach and fleetwood mac was playing softly in the background.

she sang along silently to the lyrics as she waited for robin to exit the shower.

she wished jane was there with her, till she remembered that she was trying to shake the younger girl off her mind. starling wanted to forget her feelings for jane because she didn't want to hurt her. girls like el were precious, and they deserved to be protected at all costs. star knew she could protect jane, but she didn't know if she could protect jane from her own self.

starling had surrounded herself with so much toxic people that she adopted their mannerisms, giving people attitudes and even teasing them. she was a bully, she knew that. that wasn't the type of person that jane deserved.

jane deserved someone who could promise they'd never hurt her, and starling knew she wasn't going to be able to keep that promise.

starling sighed, rubbing her eyes as she noticed they began to sting.

suck it up star, you barely know her.

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