Sweet Baby Addy

Chapter 3.

Addy's POV
Falling asleep on Jace was a little weird. That I was okay with the situation at all was beyond my comprehension. I'll admit, the break from reality was really nice for a minute but I have to get back.
The panic of my situation ratcheted higher as I sat on his lap now. There was cut up pb&j in front of me on a princess plate.
Next to that was a very cute sparkly sippy cup. It was kinda fun to play with because the glitter inside moved with my movements. I decided very quickly the cup was awesome.  This all distracted my fuzzy mind for a moment before I snapped back to reality.
"Jace?" I asked hoping he'd respond to his actual name. I wasn't about to call him his stupid freaking title.
I heard a sigh behind me before he spoke.
"Yeah baby?" He seemed a little worried at what I might say as I hadn't spoken much. I had a lot to sort out so I needed this to count. I cleared the fuzz from my brain and organized a list in my mind. Pee, then leave. That's all the plan I had. And the peeing part was pretty damn important.
" I I'm really grateful for this little break." I started, pausing to make sure I did this well. I felt his arm wrap low on my waist adding pressure to an already urgent situation. " I reallly need a bathroom though and should probably head on home soon. I have work in the-"
I was cut off.
" shhh baby it's okay. Little girls don't need bathrooms. That's why you have your diaper silly girl." I panicked at his words. He was insane. He brushed the hair from my face and lifted my eyes to his.
"Baby just relax, okay? You're home now. No more work." He kept talking as he added more pressure to my bladder. The tears were welling in my eyes. "No more stress, no more bills, no more pain."
A lie! This, holding it was so painful. Sooooo painful. I kept thinking about how hard it was getting to hold it. My eyes brimming with tears as he rubbed strong circles on my tummy. And then it happened. I felt myself get warm. I felt my body relax. And I wept. I leaned on jace and sobbed until I couldn't feel anymore.
My mind went hazy as I sat on his lap. It felt like I'd reached full hysteria. I couldn't control my crying as jace carried me into the sunshiny nursery. I didn't even register him laying me on the changing table. My mind came back only as he was closing up the new diaper.
"Why, jace?" That was all I said before I started crying again.
His eyes were so kind still, almost loving as he focused on me. He brushed the tears from my face and listened to my cries but didn't respond. He praised me for using my diaper but ignored my question. I kept crying.
Jace's POV.
My girl has been crying for an hour. I haven't tried to pacify her at all. I want her tears. No, of course they don't bring me joy. My baby just hasn't been allowed to be sad or scared in so long. So she cried and I did nothing to stop her.
I held her, taking in her closeness. God I've waited years to hold my little girl. I've waited years to watch her flourish. I felt myself tense at the thought of failure. I knew her question deserved an answer, I knew she might hate me, but I had to try.
"Sweet girl, don't you fall asleep." I spoke as I heard her breathing soften. She sighed and hiccuped into my neck. Already so trusting of me.
"Do you remember the day you made me cry baby?" She kept listening without response. I knew she understood what I was talking about. "That's why sweetheart. I knew that day that you needed someone to hold you and take care of you." She looked up at me then and nodded.
"Silly jace" She fiddled with her fingers "nobody can handle me" her face saddened even more. She sniffles as she tried to pull herself together. "I'm too far gone." She smiled then. I could see the resolve in her eyes. "It's okay though, you tried! Trying was very kind of you jace."
She was trying to console me now? Man, my sweet Addy is indeed insane.
"Honeybee," I spoke calmly to her "let me show you a greater kindness. Try to accept what I have to offer okay? Just trust daddy. I'm not here to hurt you baby. I kissed her forehead and stood with her pressed to me.
"Yes daddy" I could've hallucinated her voice, it was so quiet. But I looked down and saw a teary little girl with her thumb in her mouth.
"Thank you baby" my heart soared.