chapter1

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I can see a scenery within the light.

It’s like…the time when I was a child, submerged under the pool and looking up toward the sky…I see a scenery with that kind of vague, yet nostalgic feeling.

The scenery flows along and changes.

Like an old film, the blurry scenes continued to be replaced, one by one.

A man holding 『my』 small hands….A woman, holding 『me』 in her arms….Boys and girls that were even a little bigger than 『I』.

From the window of a bus, seeing large buildings and small stores drifting away.

And from inside of a train, witnessing the never ending railroad and endless townscape.

The scenes continued to change, and then there was a 『me』 that had grown bigger and was attending school with other children wearing the same uniform.

Chatting with friends, exchanging texts late into the night….Sitting together with siblings on the sofa, watching a borrowed movie. Our parents returning home, and everyone enjoying a meal together.

This scenery full of happiness, abruptly began turning 『white』.

White walls, white floor, and lying on top of the white bed under the same white colored sheets, what was reflected in 『my』 eyes, was the pure white ceiling….

The shaking hands that I lifted up, were as thin as the withered branches of a tree.

The scene continuously shifted, but that white world remained….and amidst the broken and hoarse sound of someone crying….『My』 world slowly became dyed in black.

***

Was I…seeing a dream?

Somehow, the dream felt nostalgic…and distant.

I wonder…where is this place? I can’t see a thing, it’s as if a dim…mist is hanging over me. It feels just like staring into the sun and being dazzled…oh, I should just open my eyes.

And when I tried lifting my eyelids, the scene of my surroundings jumped into my field of vision much clearly than before.

What I saw, wasn’t a grass-covered plain, nor the interior of a room, but instead, there was nothing but an emptiness that spread everywhere; cracked earth as far as the eyes could see and a plain dark sky.

Simply put, there was nothing but rough gray earth, not even a weed in sight. An empty world.

「……………」

The atmosphere would have been completed if a cold wind was to blow along dead, withered leaves at this moment. I wonder if that describes what Im feeling right now.

Leaving that aside…I wonder, how am I seeing all of this…?

I don’t remember opening my eyes. When I concentrate, I’m able to see in all directions at the same time. Of course, that includes myself….

「………………!?」

I unintentionally let out a scream…or so I thought, but my voice wouldn’t come out.

After all…I have no mouth….Not to mention a mouth, I didn’t even have a body.

R, right…I’m a little calmer now.

By the way, when I said I had no body, that was just a bit incorrect. As proof of that, even now the form of my body is responding to my flunctuating emotions; scattering and undulating.

It’s something like a gassy, misty, light brown-ish aggregation…which is the current me.

Haha…makes me laugh. Although it’s nothing funny.

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