S.E.A.L IV: All I Need

Chapter 33

Wow if all of that happened and yall were on good terms why did you file for divorce Charli? I thought it was best given the situation. I didn't want to put her through any more stress than I already had. You didn't put me through any more stress you waited till I was 2 months post birth and had me served, and you didn't think that would cause me stress. I figured.... I figured that you would be better off without me Nia. Better off without you Charli? What kind of shit is that, you are my husband? We have 9 damn kids together why would I be better off without you? I made a huge mistake and I just didn't think you'd forgive me. Hell, my own aunts aren't even talking to me because of it. What did you do Charli? I went outside of my marriage. We've covered that. No, I went outside my marriage, I followed in my father's footsteps, I am no better than he is.

Can you excuse me for a minute, Nia said getting up and leaving the room? Charli, can I ask you something? Go ahead we paying you a hundred and ten dollars an hour. You've mentioned more than once that you don't want to be like father, however from all of the information that you've you shared it seems like he's a good man or at least he's trying to be a good man. Doc I've just told you a small tip of the relationship with my father, he's good now but he wasn't always good. He wasn't in your life when you were younger. Define in my life, because he was around but he wasn't the father I need him to be. She nodded a little before looking down at her notes and speaking again, your relationship with women is different because of how you were raised right. What you trying to say? I am just saying, that it seems like you put more trust in the women in your life than you do in the men. Why wouldn't I, that's all I've ever known, my aunts raised me, and when I wasn't with them, I was with my grandmother, I didn't have a lot of men role models when I was younger. Hence why you started your nonprofit for young males to have that guidance and support. Exactly why. If one of them were in your situation what would you tell them? I don't even know, what would you tell a woman who has a baby outside of their marriage? I'd probably tell her that people make mistakes, but if your partner is willing to stand by you through the bull shit then you got a good one.

Where were we Nia said coming back into the room? I was just asking Charli, what he would tell his mentees if they were in this situation? She looked at me waiting for my response. I'd probably tell them that if you have a good one you keep her, especially if she's willing to stand by you through the bullshit. And you Nia what would you tell a young woman who's married if they were going through this situation? I'd probably tell her to remember why she married the person in the first place. No one is perfect and mistakes happen she said looking at me. You really believe that? I do because if it wasn't true you and I never would have gotten this far. If I didn't love you the way I do, we would have been over the night you through my rape in my face. That's true love Charli the counselor said nodding in agreeance with Nia.

You really willing to stand by through this Nia? You're all I need Charli!

~ Charli~

It's been about a month and a half since the gender reveal and I still haven't talked to my Aunt, if she wasn't avoiding me before, she's seriously doing it now, I tried my old tactic of calling her assistant and setting up an appointment but she was hip to that, told her assistant she wasn't taking any new appointments. I tried to sneak up on her at the store, studio, and even the house and she still wouldn't see me. After about 2 weeks I let it go I didn't want to fight with my aunt and also, we had to get these ready to go back to school. Summer was officially over and time for use to get back into the hang of things. Especially when you have 1 senior, an 8th grader, 2 6th graders, a 4th grader, and 2 1st graders. And don't forget that Nia is about 8 months pregnant, so you know our household is busy as hell.

Daddy! Daddy! Yes, baby girl? Am I gonna do gymnastics this year? I don't know baby do you want to do gymnastics. I don't know the coach told me I can't eat gummy bears if I am doing gymnastics. You wanna eat gummy bears? I like gummy bears she said with a straight face. We'll find you something different okay. Okay daddy she said running off. Wheew okay new activity for Desi I said to myself. Hey Princess, I said to Sarai! Hi Dad, she said taking a seat. Initially the older kids weren't calling us mom and dad, but as time goes on all of them call us mom and dad. It was weird having a 19 year old call me dad, but I realized he was doing it to show respect so that the younger kids would see that we're all a complete family now. Which reminds me I need to call the adoption attorney to see what's going on with the court date.