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I needed to put my feelings somewhere

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AND YES, THAT'S MY UGLY STUPID FACE ON THE COVER. IDK WHY I DID THAT, I THINK I FELT A SUDDEN BOOST OF CONFIDENCE OR YEH I THINK THAT'S IT... Ok you can (obviously, duhh) read this and stuff but pls don't judge me ok? Xx Life

#anxiety #complaining #depression #havingdepressionandanxietysucks #imweird #myemotions #myeverything #myfeelings #mylife #mythoughts #poems #selfcriticism #shortstories

WHAT?

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SOOOO ... YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT BEAUTIFUL EVENTS MY LIFE HAS BROUGHT ME AGAIN 

                          
I. LOVE. IT

                          
NOTE THE PURE DESPERATION HERE

                          
So my grandfather (from my mothers side) has had prostate cancer in the past and because back then it had already kind of spread he couldn't be cured only suppressed(y'all get that right? Otherwise google it) 

                          
AND SURPRISE!! IT'S BACK!! And now they were too late with the suppressing treatment so it has spread to his pelvis, ribs and kidneys. They're still not done with the tests and they suspect it's in his intestines too

                          
And I'm NOT STUPID OK? I know that when it's spread that much inside one's body they can die within a few weeks. And I probably sound very selfish right now but I have never ever been to a funeral in my entire life and I just don't want him to be the first ...

                          
And I just really want him to celebrate his own b-day this year (september 21th) and mine too (september 23th) ... AND MAYBE I'M JUST BEING PARANOID BUT I DON'T FREAKING CARE ANYMORE


                          
SO A BRIEF SUMMARY BEFORE I'M GONE AGAIN - JUST WHEN YOU'RE GETTING YOUR LIFE A LITTLE BACK ON TRACK IT'S GONNA BLOW UP RIGHT INTO YOUR FACE 
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G O O D - F U C K I N G - N I G H T
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Xx,
Life
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