Endless Love (Jessie J)

Chapter 7: Catching up with lies.

Jessie's POV

"Rose? Do you know where my onion glasses are? I've been searching for them all over the place, but  those bastards are nowhere to be found." I sighed frustrated while slamming the last slider of the kitchen counter closed again. 

"Rose?" I kept on staring at the onions that were lying in front of me, realising that if eyes could shoot, there wouldn't have been any need in preparing them anymore. I sighed again when the sound of her voice stayed away, and eventually started attacking the fuckers with my eyes half closed, hoping I would still have all of my fingers once I'd be done with them. 

"The things I do for you, Holly", I muttered to no one in particular. My red haired friend was coming over for dinner tonight and I wanted everything to be more than perfect. It had been so long since I had seen her face to face, without a digital screen between us, and I had missed her so much. The last few days had been pretty hectic and I was in need of a moment where I could just dump everything off and talk it through with someone else than Rose. The constant sharp atmosphere of pretending everything was okay was freaking me out. Rose kept on acting like nothing was wrong, but I couldn't. I wanted to pretend like it, for her, but it was getting harder with the day. And everytime I gathered all my strenght to bring it up, my system somehow shut down when seeing her staring at the little picture of the ecography the doctor had given us. That smile on her face, that beautiful thing I adored so much, had turned into something dangerous lately. And I had no idea which consequences that could possibly bring. But I did know that I probably wasn't ready to face them.

I finished my soup after I was ready with the onions and took a satisfied look at all the dishes that were ready to be eaten tonight. Over the years my love for cooking had only grown bigger and when I had time to do it, I enjoyed every second of it. I turned off the stove and turned around to walk back into the living room, seeing that Rose still wasn't there. She had been upstairs for hours already and I had no idea what she was up to. I wanted to go check out on her, but once I was standing at the stairs, I decided to just let her be for a while. Maybe she was just in need of a moment for herself. Or maybe I was. 

I turned on the tv and put on a music channel, something that I'd normally never do. I stared at the different videoclips for a while, but once a very familiar sound came on, I immediately realised again why I didn't watch these things. I saw my own dark silhouette walking its way to a set, accompanied by the sound of high heels on concrete. I was slightly surprised they still played Wild, as there were already so many other, more recent videos out. I caught myself on smiling a tiny smile when thinking 'bout how much my head looked like a fluffy tennis ball back then. Nevertheless, shaving off my hair for Comic Relief had been one of the best things I had ever done in my carreer so far. But I was Rose still very thankful for keeping me from getting a Nike tick shaved into the back of my head, that would've been too much. I couldn't keep a giggle from rolling out my throat. The comments that would have produced by it though... It would possibly have been even worse than the lilac lipstick incident. 

"Ah, the joy of being famous", I smirked while turning the tv back off. I felt an exciting bubble forming itself in my stomach when thinking about my new album that was about to be released in just a week time. There were already so many interviews and performanced booked, my agenda was almost exploding. Luckily, I still had my manager to sort everthing out for me and bring me to the right places. Without him I'd probably end up being lost between BBC Radio and Capital, not knowing where to go next. I wasn't working with William anymore, long story short he had fucked up somewhere in the third year of my carreer. He had almost caused me to not be able to bring out a second album. Luckily, Cez had picked me up on the right moment, thanks to him I was still climbing higher with every year. A warm feeling floaded through my body when thinking about all the things that were about to come up. It made my heart beat a little bit faster, and my blood run a little bit quicker. I almost couldn't wait to be on route again.