Cheer-Streaked: A Westbridge Over-Drama

15: Time Waits For No Freak

Sabrina squinted at me again as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear - this time, she was sizing me up, trying to figure out if I was for real or not. "Then tell me... what do you really want?"

"I want... I want you not to hate me."

"Why? You hate me."

"No I don't. I told you I don't."

This time, when she spoke, I could hear a little of the frost thawing. "Then why can't you just not hate me? Why do you have to keep playing games?"

"Because it's all I know!" I sniffled a little - pathetic, maybe, but this was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do. Think about it: all those conditioned responses I'd been carefully building since childhood were fighting against my actions. I had to make her see that. "S-Sabrina, I'm trying to learn how to be straight with you, but it- it's still just second-nature, okay? Maybe that makes me a bad person, but my instinct is to... to..."

"Shut everyone out?"

"Yeah." One more deep breath, then said what I really wanted to say here. "And... you were right. Well, sort of."

An eyebrow went up. "Sort of right?"

"At the- well, that night, you were going to say I didn't want to be a cheerleader, but that's not completely true." At that point I realised I was rubbing my arm nervously, something I hadn't done since kindergarten; to make myself stop, I started gesturing emphatically the way she always does. "I like cheering okay, but... no, I don't want to be the ice queen anymore. It's..."

She waited a minute, then prodded me. "It's what?"

"...lonely."

And then she smiled. It was still kind of a sad smile, but it was real. "I know. Well, not from personal experience, but... I see it in you all the time. I always kinda got that 'nobody can touch me here, but that also kinda sucks' vibe from you, y'know?"

"Really?"

"Yep." She glanced over at Harvey and Val in the distance, hovering near Harvey's beat-up mess of a car. "Look, I better catch up to them before they leave me behind. I'm glad you're coming around, though."

"Wait, Sabrina..."

"Hmm?"

It was too weird. We ended this on such a good note that I didn't think I wanted to say anything else, but I had to. The iron was hot - I couldn't just let this drop, I'd dove in too deep. In for a penny, in for... for- oh, shoot, there's more to that old saying but I can't remember it. Anyway, I figured if I didn't finish saying what I wanted to say now, I'd probably never work up the balls to broach the subject again.

"I... I was wondering if..."

Harvey's horn honked. "Can it wait? We'll have plenty of time to talk later, you could call me."

"No, I- I have to do this now. It would just be... I dunno, it would suck to put it off any longer."

I could see she was genuinely curious now. "Hey, what is it? Ask me anything."

Deep breath; I was rubbing my arm again. "I was wondering if we could... be friends."

"We are friends, Libby."

"No, I mean it - not just a 'let's agree not to totally despise each other' thing, but... I really mean it."

And there was the smile; the one that made the sun shining on her face look dull by comparison... the smile I thought I'd never see again. "We are friends, Libby," she repeated, hugging me. "We have been for a while... you just didn't know it."