Bloodstream | Nate Jacobs

Chapter twenty-two:

Song for this chapter: Devil in me -Halsey

"Mom," I called out, "I'm home."

I threw my purse on the bench beside the front door and made my way to the kitchen where I could hear the sound of dishes clanking in the sink and running water. After turning the corner into the kitchen, there was my mom in her pajamas in front of the sink washing dishes.

"Mom," I repeated.

"Jesus," My mom squeaked out, "I didn't hear you come in."

"Sorry I didn't come home. It was late and I just decided to stay the night at Nate's," I explained awkwardly while Nate stood behind me.

My mom turned around while wiping her soapy hands on one of the dry dishtowels that was beside the dish rack.

"It is nice to meet you Mrs.Cooper," Nate spoke firmly, a smile on his pink lips.

"I don't care that you weren't home Lily. I know that when you are home alone you don't listen to our rules. But when I call you. That means pick up your phone."

"I had my ringer off for supper and I guess I forgot to turn it back on," I muttered leaning up against the cupboard.

"Take your pills," My mom ordered, tossing the dishtowel on the counter top. 

"Mom," I hissed, lowering my eyes at her.

"Let me guess you haven't told him yet. Either way, take your damn pill," My mom spoke in an annoyed tone. 

"Fine," I muttered, "I shouldn't have even come home."

"Lily," Nate warned.

"You going to lecture me now too?" I spat back.

I was embarrassed. Now Nate was going to question me on what kind of pills I was taking and why. And how was I supposed to tell him I was on anti-psychotics because I am a freak. He will surely go right back too, Maddy.

"No, just please take your pills and don't get upset so we can have a good day together,"

I exhaled deeply nodding my head. Nate was right. It wasn't worth getting worked up over.

"Okay," I cooed.

I stepped over to the cupboard that harbored my multi bottles of pills, some that were even old and most likely expired. I grabbed three bottles and grabbed a pill from each. My Mom and Nate both stared at me silently as I grabbed a glass of milk and downed my pills.

"There. Happy now," I grumbled.

"Yes. It is only you that makes your life hard Lily," My mom sighed.

"That is nice," I sneered back. "Maybe if you actually cared about me instead of constantly worrying about me having a psychotic breakdown."

"I do care for you," My mom protested.

"No, you don't. I've always been a burden. When was the last time you told me you loved me," I harped back.

My mom stood in silence, a defeated look rested on her face. It wasn't fair of me to put that on her when I have caused so much grief that it has literally ruined their lives but I couldn't stop the hateful vile that spewed from my mouth every damn time that I was in a room with her. I resented her. She sided with my brother. Her exact words were that I was doing this all for attention. That I am a troublesome bitch that ruins everyone's lives.

""I'll be back tonight. But I doubt you'll be sober enough to notice if I am home or not," I muttered hastily, slamming my empty cup on the cupboard beside her. 

I stepped out of the kitchen without another thought and turned down the hallway to my bedroom. I was dying for an outfit that wasn't absolutely suffocated me. I could hear Nate's heavy feet following behind me. Man now I was definitely going to have to explain some shit to him. At least just anything that will stop him from asking questions.

"I just need to change and then we can go," I grumbled. Still very much annoyed from the scene that just happened in the kitchen. 

"Okay."

"Come here," Nate spoke calmly. 

"No," I pouted, "You'll hug me and make me not mad anymore."

"Is that a bad thing," Nate chuckled.

"Yes," I whined.

"Fine... Gizmo but I am gonna go sit in the truck before you mom castrates me."

"Not if I do it first," I threatened.

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"Maddy texted me again," Nate said as he put his phone down on the table.

"And you're telling me why?" I said with a mouthful of food.

I picked up my coffee cup, taking a big sip to help wash down the dry peanut butter toast.

"I thought that is what people did in healthy relationships," Nate mumbled.

"Healthy relationship?" I repeated. The foreign word felt strange on my tongue. "Never had one of those so I wouldn't know."

"I haven't answered any of her messages or anything. I just thought you'd like to know that she saw me at your house and was asking what we were up too," Nate spoke as he stabbed his fork into his sunny side up eggs.

"Tell her we were having really dirty and sweaty sex," I joked, picking up my other piece of toast.

"Funny, but I'll pass," Nate laughed, "Are you sure you don't want anything else to eat."

I shook my head biting into the creamy peanut butter and dry toast. It was really terrible but hey at least the peanut butter tasted good. I held the toast in my hand and did a little shimmy with my hips to signify that I was happy.

"So when are we making that dating account or whatever?" I questioned eagerly, picking back up the coffee cup.

"Whenever you want. But you don't need to be apart of it," Nate cooed, looking up at me with saddened eyes. 

"Don't do that. Don't start acting like I'm fragile just because I let you in on one of my darkest secrets. I am still the same stone-cold bitch that you first met," I spoke firmly.

"Okay, got it," Nate smiled, "I'll make an account and we can both just log into it on our phones. We will do it in shifts so when one of us is in a class with her she won't catch on."

I did honestly feel bad. Jules didn't deserve this. But I wanted to make Nate proud of me. I wanted him to know that no matter what I was on his side. I would do anything that he asked me to do. No matter how fucked up.

"Okay. That doesn't sound hard at all," I shrugged picking up my hot coffee cup again. 

"So..." Nate sighed, "Do you want to talk about what your mom said?"

"I'm on anti-psychotics for Bipolar. Currently, right now I am on short term use of Abilify and Clozaril since the whole lighting his house on fire shebang. Everyone thinks I'm psychotic from the whole thing."

It wasn't far from the truth. I just failed to mention that I have been on short term treatments almost my whole life. And that I thought it was all bullshit that they could even diagnose me when I won't talk about any of the shit that goes on inside my head. 

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A/N- I had some extra time today, so double update! Hope you are all having a fantastic Wednesday.

Which side of Nate do you guys prefer? Sweet and caring/ Sociopath asshole