Our Little Secret [Jeon Jungkook FF]

Chapter 4: Regretful

I woke up the next morning feeling moody. I had some troubles falling asleep last night. I kept replaying how I handled the situation with Kookie. At times I felt as if I was too harsh and then at others I felt like I handled it the way that I should have. I'm in a fight with myself. I don't want him to hate me, but I wanted him to know genuinely how I felt. I felt betrayed, abandoned. But, how could I honestly be mad? We're not a real couple. It's all a lie. Jungkook is not my boyfriend. He doesn't have to go anywhere for me on his own, but to think after all this time that we've been together, he might have picked me for once over Eunha. It's not like I ask for him to do these kinds of things with me all the time, it was one time, just one.

I sighed to myself and plopped myself back onto my bed. How in the hell am I gonna face him? Do we act as if that argument never had happened? Do we address the issue once more? I roughly put my hands through my hair. I don't know what the fuck to do!!

After a while of staring up at the ceiling, I shot up. That's it! I'm just going to address this if he decides to talk with me. There's no point in pretending like it didn't truly bother me. I have a voice for a reason, I'm going to talk this out with him. I have to.

I spent the rest of my morning thinking of different ways this could play out. I thought of a lot of things to say to him. But, most importantly, I'm going to be honest with him. I thought I was honest enough last night, but there's so much more to say that I didn't. I can do this! Y/N fighting!

✎...

I arrived at BigHit's building not too long past noon. There was some things ahead of time that I needed to do before trying to find Jungkook.

I slowly made my way into the main lobby when my name was called out, "Y/N?!" I turned my head to see an excited Soobin.

"Soobinnie?! It's been so long!" I hugged him as we caught up to each other.

"Too long! To think since you come here all the time that I'd see you more often." he chuckled.

"Honestly, but you guys have been working so hard on your new album so I'm not surprised our paths haven't crossed." I smiled patting him on the back, "Continue to work hard okay? I'm rooting for you guys!".

"Thank you." he bowed slightly, "I saw a lot of the photos from the event, you and Jimin killed it! Looking at that, you wouldn't think that it was your first serious event." he smiled.

My heart fluttered a bit, he's just so sweet! "Awe thanks Soo." I hugged him one last time, "I would truly love to keep chatting, but I have some important business to take care of. Maybe we could all go for food together one day to catch up more?" I smiled bowing out of respect.

"Sounds good! I'll warn the guys! Bye bye!" he smiled, bowed and took his leave.

Somehow that was a mood uplifter. Thanks Soobin!

✎...

After meeting with some staff regarding my event experience I made my way to the main practice room to see if I could find anyone, importantly- Jungkook. I'm going to give him a piece of my mind!

As I walked past the glass my heart skipped a beat. Of course he's in here. He's always working hard no matter what time of the year it is, comeback season or even break period, this boy can't ever stay away from a practice room. I found myself unconsciously smiling towards him.

I knocked on the door and made my way in, "Pardon my intrusion." he turned to me slightly startled.

He looked towards me with a look in his eyes I've never seen before. I couldn't read his expression. I can't tell if his angry, upset, or what. Damn you Kookie... I kind of feel bad. 

He spoke low, "Oh hey Y/N..." he scratched the back of his head and turned back to the mirror to stretch.

I sighed and made my way to the corner of the room and sat down. I took a few seconds to prep myself. I have to be strong and get my point across, "Kook,  by what I said last night... I didn't mean to get so angry with you. I apologize if I made you feel some kind of way, but I don't take back anything that I said." success pt. 1.

He stopped stretching and turned his head to face me, "You don't have to apologize for anything. I understand. I would be angry with myself as well." he walked towards me and sat down.

"Y/N I really am sorry. I was a dick." he paused for a moment, "You did amazing answering your questions, you're honestly a natural. You handled yourself well and I'm proud." he smiled. He took another pause, but this one was a bit longer, "You know I saw all the pictures of you, you genuinely looked absolutely stunning. However, seeing Jimin by your side in those images made me feel regretful. I should've been the one standing next to you, complementing you." the look in his eyes said it all. 

I felt my cheeks heat up. My heart race sped up, "Ahh y-yeah, thank you." I mentally sighed, that stupid stutter.

He smiled and stood up, he reached his hand down to me to pick me up from the ground.

"Want to learn something?" He raised a brow, giggling, waiting for my response.

"Yeah, teach me." I smiled joining him in the center of the room. 

Wait, This is not how I expected this conversation to play out... Instead of being angry right now like I imagined myself to be this morning, I'm actually super happy and giddy... I might have accepted defeat without even meaning to.