everything isn't just perfect / Tracy Beaker

3 / bog off

T r a c y

I lied on my bed for hours hoping that Mum does come back and take me with her but I knew deep down that they all scared her away. There were knocks at my door - I knew they were either Shelley, Duke or Elaine but I ignored them and they always left but now I heard Duke call everyone down for dinner but I didn't move. How can I eat when all I feel is this numbness.. Was this how I felt the first time?

Another knock and the door opened this time to reveal Crash. "Go away." I said and looked away from him.

"You will get sick if you don't eat.."

"Just get out." I responded back with annoyance and he placed down the plate of food on my table then he walked a bit closer to me. 

"I made Cam interfere - I was scared your Mum will let you down again." Crash whispered softly and I looked at him.

"Well, you were wrong." I said with an annoyed tone in my voice. "She came back because she really wanted me.."

Crash looked at me. "You sure?"

"This is my Mother we are talking about not your believer father." I answered him and kind of regret it instantly but the anger was too strong. 

Crash now started to yell. "At least I know who my father is! I'm not living in some stupid dream world."

I got up from my bed. "No." I responded back softly. "You are living in the dumping ground because you're too chicken to have dreams so you ruin mine just to keep me with you." 

He turned around and he walked out of my room as I let out a big sigh then I went back into bed. I don't need him. I need my Mum..

-

It was the next morning when Duke called everyone down to breakfast when he came into my room. "Still feeling a little rough?" He asked and I looked away from him. "Come down and eat, Trace."

"Go away." I whispered from under the bed sheets.

I heard him walk away and close the door then I cuddled into the doona more as my eyes gazed to the photo of me and Cam. "Thanks for driving the one person I have been waiting for away from me."

I let myself close my eyes and sleep even though my sleep hasn't been that great.

C a m

I woke up and stared at the photo of me with Tracy then I sighed. I made a mess of things and I don't think it will be easy to get through to Tracy. The look of hurt and anger on her face yesterday really messed me up. I got dressed and decided to drive to the dumping ground to see if she will let me explain.

-

Shelley was outside with some of the younger kids planting some new flowers and she looked up at me. "Cam, hey how are you feeling?"

"I am not the one that you should be concern for.."

Shelley nodded as she stood up and gave me a hug. "She hasn't come out of her room and hasn't eaten since this has happened so if you can get her to eat.."

"I can try."

T r a c y 

Now I wish I would of grabbed Mum's number then I could call her and escape from the dumping ground. I sighed as I decided to walk out my room but when I walked out - Cam was coming up the stairs. "Oh you are up!" Cam responded with a little too much excitement and I slammed my door shut in her face. She opened the door up and I turned my back on her. "Can I please just explain where I was coming from?"