The Fallen One

Chapter Nine

I stand there mesmerized. I haven't been face-to-face with my mother in over a year, not since my cousin's wedding.

The only time I see her is on tv these days or at some special family event. She's made a name for herself as a broadcast journalist around the world. Her career has always been far more important to her then Blake and I ever could be.

"What are you doing here?" I fold my arms.

I hear footsteps growing louder from behind me. I look over my shoulder to find Casey with wide eyes and the bong still in her hand.

"Holy shit, she's back" she gasps, "I'll let the old man know" and with that, she disappears in the distance.

I revert my gaze back to my mother.

"Well?" I raise my eyebrows.

"I received your messages" she admits, licking her apple red lips while fixing her grey pencil skirt that sits at her knee. "Can I come in?"

I nod slowly, taking another step back. When she enters the house, I close the door behind her. She tucks her short hazel brown hair behind her ears then folds her arms.

"Shouldn't you be in Milan or Paris?" I mock.

"Jamaica, actually" she looks down at her red heels. "I was at the airport when I got your message and I thought I should come here and see you"

I furrow my brows "Why would you think that?"

"I'm still your mum, Chris" she reminds me, "if you didn't want me to fly here then why did you call?"

I bury my head into my hands.

"I don't know why I called, I'm an idiot" I admit, "I was high and drunk and thought it was a great idea at the time, which obviously it wasn't because calling you has never been a good idea"

There's a long pause.

"Well, I'm sorry that you feel that way," she looks away from me."I never had a choice, you know...I was never supposed to be a mother, all my options were taken away"

"You had adoption still there"

"Yeah, Raff said he wanted you and your brother" she almost laughs, "I'll tell you, after that, I didn't trust any of his promises again"

I sigh.

It's the same story told every time we meet. My dad's a liar and a drunk who makes promises he could never keep. My mum wishes we were never born.

My parents love has always been conditional.

Their love has always come with a long list of requirements that Blake and I never seemed to ever meet.

We had to work hard for their love and at the end of the day, we still weren't good enough for either of them.

Nothing we did could ever make them stay.

"Well, I'm sorry for being such an inconvenience" I roll my eyes.

Deep silence fills the air as we both just stand there in the hallway.

"I just got out of the hospital a week ago...That's why I didn't get any of your calls" my mum sighs. "I've been there since Valentine's day and my assistant has had full control over my phone since before Christmas"

Bipolar disorder. She'll disappear from the news for as long as months at a time. That's when we know that the depressive episodes are back.

"You haven't answered any of my calls for seventeen years, ma" I remind her, "You can't use this as an excuse"