Oh God These Children Have Powers Oh God Oh Fuck

Chapter 1: The N00bs

Japan is fucking ecstatic. Why, cause she's Japan. Also new peeps are moving into the neighborhood and Japan is hella bored from her old neighbors cause they're boring.

Japan brings along her gang of not-so-boring neighbors. A group of alcoholics which will now be listed from most alcoholic to least alchoholic. Russia, Poland, & Germany. Russia doesn't want to go and would rather stay home in a blanket burrito (don't we all). Poland and Germany reluctantly go because if Japan was able to get Russia to go along, they don't really want to find out how.

They ring the doorbell. A regular sounding doorbell rings and a regular looking country opens the door. He waves hello and politely ask them who the hell they are. Japan realizes this boy speaks English which she is pretty fluent in but the other three aren't. Japan introduces her gang and America invites them in. And they begin to talk.

Japan: So... America, right?

America: Yeah?

J: Why do you have such a big house? You don't look like the one to flex on people house-wise.

USA: Oh, Simple. I have 56 kids.

J: What?

USA: I said I have 56 kids (Authors note: whore).

J: How are you able to live with that many tiny demons? It sounds very tiring.

USA: It is, but the fact that all of us help eachother with our superpowers makes it quite easy.

J: What?

USA: I said the fact that most of them moved out and-

J: You have superpowers.

USA: All of us do. I can communicate in anyway in any language absolutely perfectly, no matter if the language is extinct, made up for a fictional universe, or not even born yet.

(Authors note: I'm not gonna use Google translate for the parts in other languages because I don't trust it, just look at what it does to Hawaiian)

J: *in japanese* Really? I wouldn't have had a clue you could speak Japanese!

USA: *also in Japanese* Yeah, most people think I can only speak one language (*cough cough*) but once they realize I have this power, they stop trash talking me in their language. It also helps when several of my children aren't native English speakers.

Russia: *in Russian* So, if you can understand me, does that mean I don't have to embarrass myself with my crappy English skills?

USA: *in Russian* Yes, absolutely. All of y'all can speak in your native tongues!

Russia: *in German* Ya hear that Germany, you won't have to embarrass yourself.

Germany: *in German* Yes I heard that. Have you forgotten that I'm fluent in Russian.

All of a sudden. Poland starts to itch, like really itch. So of course he scratches. He scratches so much that he almost resembles a 14yo Billie Eilish fan's soul scratching it's way outside of her body after reading another Sbeve quote.

America seems to know exactly what's happening and calls down a certain someone by the name of Florida.