Male Stand User Reader x Megumin

The Masochist

Kazuma: Uhm...

Darkness: Those two slimy ladies earlier were allys of your, right? What in the world did that to them?

Kazuma: Oh, uh. They were swallowed by giant toads, and the mucus-

Darkness: What?! It's worse than I imagined...

Kazuma: *thoughts* What's with this woman knight?

Darkness: No, wait! As a knight, I can not overlook such horror befalling two girls of such a tender age!

Kazuma: *thoughts* Her eyes are scaring me... She's setting of my danger radar. It's telling me something's up with her, just like Aqua and Megumin. *Speaks* No, I'd advise against it. It's hard to say how useful one of our members is, another can only use her magic onve per day, one is actually capable of something but really scary, and I'm the lowest job class. Our party's total trash, so I'd recommend you look elsewhe- *She nearly crushes his arm* Ow, ow, ow!

Darkness: That's even better! The truth is, this was a bit difficult for me to say, but while I have confidence in my strength and stamina, I am clumsy... So, um... None of my attacks ever hit their mark.

Kazuma: *thoughts* Looks like my sensor was spot-on.

Darkness: As, so. *She leans pretty close to him* I'll charge to the front line, so please use me as a shield!

Kazuma: *thoughts* Her face is too close! The negative effects of my long life as a shut-in are kicking in now?! No, that isn't it! This is just to stimulating for an adolscent virgin like me! Stay calm... Don't be seduced by her womanly charms! *Speaks* No. I could never use a woman as a shield.

Darkness: It would be my pleasure!

Kazuma: Well, we get eaten by monsters in every battle.

Darkness: That would be even more my pleasure!

Kazuma: *thoughts* Oh, I get it. It's not just her abilities. She's hopeless to the core.

King Crimson

Kazuma: I was so worn out, I slept until noon...

Aqua(In the distance): Hup!

Kazuma went to the guild. He sees Y/N and Aqua there. Y/N looked like he wants to kill himself, while Aqua is doing party tricks.

Kazuma: Y/N what is she doing?

Y/N: Party tricks... I don't know why...

Aqua: Look, Kazuma! What do you think of my newly aquired skill set? Isn't it befitting of a water goddess like myself?

Kazuma: *thoughts* That's a party trick skill, you low-grade goddess...

King Crimson

You sit with Kazuma and Megumin at the bar.

Kazuma: You can learn skills with the points you saved up, huh? I'll have to be careful not to use them on any weird skills.

Megumin: First you get some one to teach you how to use a skill. Then the entry will appear on your card. If you use your points on that entry, you'll finish learning it.

Kazuma: Does that mean if I have you teach me, I could learn to use explosion magic, too?

Megumin: Exactly! That's exactly right, Kazuma! If you want to learn explosion magic, I'll teach you as much as you want! Heck, is there any other skill more worthwhile to learn? No, there certainly is not! Come, now, and walk the path of explosions with me!

Kazuma: *thoughts* Her face is to close... *speaks* Hey, calm... calm down little girl! Besides, I only have three points right now...

Y/N: *thoughts* Thank Speedwagon I didn't choose Killer Queen as my stand. If she saw explosions from me, I would never have a free minute again and I would feel like David Bowie with a hand fetish...