-'ᴅʀᴀʙʙʟᴇs'-

Sirius's letter 🥀

Dear Moony,

If you read this then I'm no longer alive, I wish I was. Or maybe not. So many things changed, remember when we used to think we could survive anything? When we were young and free? I miss this.

None of us deserved this, you didn't. I didn't. Neither did Harry. I can't say how much I wish things had been different. I used to think that it would be alright, at first. I had to think that.

I don't know anymore, I feel like everything is already gone. Even with you here, it's not the same. We changed, you and I. I know you still feel the same way about me, and I hope you know, I'm still deeply in love with you. This is the only thing that hadn't changed.

And Harry. Remember when we saw him smiling for the time? With that wild smile, so much like Lily? I miss it so much, he doesn't smile like this anymore. I didn't even heard him laugh. It's not fair. He deserves so much more than this, he deserves to laugh and smile and to enjoy his life. He used to giggles so much when he was a baby, he smiled for the simple thing.

Something didn't change about him, since the day he was born, we used to call him our sunshine. He was our personal light. That hasn't changed. He still is, isn't he? Please, don't let him down. Don't let him think he has no one, and don't let your insecurities win. He loves you so much, and it's not because you're not officially his godfather that it means he doesn't see you like one. [..]

“You were my light too, Sirius. You still are.” Remus whispered.

“I fucking hope so, we're married.” Sirius answered, smugly, “I wrote that before Harry's fifth year. I was scared. I thought it would never end.”

“Do you still want me to do it?” Remus asked, uncertain.

“Sirius's opinion doesn't matter here.”

“Thanks Haz.”

“You're welcome,” Harry offered an innocent smile to Sirius, “Remus, I really want you to sign the adoption paper. I don't care if I'm already 18, I don't care of what people would say. This is what I want. It was supposed to be like this a long time ago, it should have been.”

And with a last smile, and the need to cry and to hug his sunshine, Remus signed the paper.