𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚕𝚢 ✰ 𝑱𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒉 𝑴𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒔 DISCONTINUED

𝚃𝚆𝙾

I drank the third bottle of beer tonight- partying all night sucks especially when you're drowning yourself with grief. I watch as the people dance together in different steps. I look at myself.

Ugh, this dress cost so much of my father's credit card and no guys even dare to go up to me and introduce themselves, I badly want a patcher right now- the one who'd let you forget about the pain and took you out of the pits of despair.

"One more please," I signaled the bartender and he nodded. Thank God I have high tolerance of alcohol. As the bartender came back with my drink- I grabbed it and payed him his tip and walk away. Trying to find the right guy to be with. As I snoop around like a desperate woman, because I am. I started to realize that my knees get weaker.

But I'm not drunk yet. The music boomed inside my head.

"Is nobody gonna date me?!" I yelled since no one can hear me. The people who heard me looked at me as if I'm a big mess.

Well, I am.

"I'll date you!" A guy voluntered. I gave a loathed expression and turn back to where I was before. "Not you." I muttered and sat down on one of the booths.

I drank the beer- I let out a sigh of relief when the alcohol went down to my throat.

Who would wanna date a depressed potato? No one. Not even J- I mean, never mind that. I drank the beer again and stared at the ceiling- feeling lonely and needed someone to hold on. I sighed and look back at the crowd.

My phone vibrated from my purse, I sighed and unlocked it.

Dad.

I let out a shaky breath and answer his phone. "Dad!" I gleamed, anxiousness surface around my face.

"Y/n, How- are you in a club again? Jesus, Y/n how many times have I told you that you're not allowed to do this! You just worried me again! Come on Y/n you're better than this." He ranted. Ouch, dad you could've turned me down more nicer. I sighed and look at the crowd.

"Dad, it's just for tonight. I need time- I, I just want to have fun." I assured him. I heard him sighed in disappointed. I rolled my eyes because he'll rant on me again about monies and health.

"Just go home. I don't want the situation gets more severe especially about you." He warned. Well, atleast he didn't talk as if he was trying to compete Eminem with the rapping.

"Okay, okay fine. Bye." Without a shadow of a doubt I pressed end. I'm just sober and I wanna get lost with the world.

Damn, if only I haven't done what I did five years ago.

I guess I'll go home, I'm wasting money and health and the music isn't that good. I grab my purse and walk my way to the door.

"The party isn't that good, and the music is dying like a goat." I walk up to the bouncer before heading out. There's no need for an answer because it was real and agreeable.

The night embraced me with its coldness. I shiver down my spine and unlock my car. As I got in the car I held the steering wheel.

I stared ahead of me, trying to puzzle everything. Suddenly a tear slipped down from my eyes making me wonder why I cried again. "Oh stop it, y/n. It's done, he's gone." I muttered and wipe the tears.

I placed my head against the steering wheel and hit it my head on it over and over until I'll knock out my senses. "I still love you, Jo." I muttered to myself and let out the tears soak my face.

"I- I don't know what to do without you." I cried. And inhale intensely. "I sound like bitch,"

I turn on the ignition and drove off. I don't get myself.