Theodosia

c a s t + i n t r o

C A S T

DANIELLE ROSE RUSSELL as THEODOSIA

RAMI MALEK as AHKMENRAH

NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM CAST as THEMSELVES

*tiny disclaimer: i looked up what Spartan women were supposed to look like and research suggests they were possibly light-skinned and fair-haired and present day Greeks are a result of invasion and interbreeding, but feel free to imagine her however you want! Lighter, darker, taller, shorter, bigger, smaller, go nuts. If you do, let me know who you imagine her as!*

I N T R O D U C T I O N 

(feel free to skip, I won't be offended)

a/n: okay, so to start, no - I have literally no idea why I up and wrote a night at the museum fanfiction, but I did, and I hate myself because it's kind of the only thing I've ever finished writing wise. So am I the worst? Absolutely. This was kind of random, my family loves the movie and one night - like the most tragic epiphany of all time - I thought: "okay this movie HAS to have fanfiction, right?" I couldn't think of for who, so basically I completely forgot Rami Malek was in that movie despite just watching it. Maybe I thought everyone was writing steamy love stories about Ben Stiller? I don't know. Anyways, so there was indeed fanfiction and I just could not stop reading it, I was so fascinated - why? Because it was highkey really fucking good. I literally was never attracted to the dead guy with the funky hat, but I forced myself to, for the sake of this new addiction to his fanfiction. And like, I'm a hoe for Spartans, which is an off chute from what I was just talking about, but don't worry about it, and I thought: "okay, what if I wrote a story where the main character is like a Spartan exhibit or smth" and then I did and it is currently my only real accomplishment as a writer.

Sad? Possibly.

Regardless, my dumbass managed to finish something for once so I thought, why not post it? I'm sure barely anyone will read it, but like? Why not? You know? So that's what I'm doing. Because, and I can't stress this enough, a night at the museum fanfiction is my only piece of writing that is longer than one chapter and a half after I decided I didn't want to write it anymore so-

I'm like lowkey a little proud of it - sue me. I never accomplish anything, this is progress for me. Also, I just realized after reading this that I all but say writing night at the museum fanfiction is lame, but it's not, and I will forever stan Ahkmenrah fics, mostly I'm just disappointed in myself, you know? Because I'm in my second year of university, majoring in English, and have been writing for a long time, and the only thing I have managed to finish is a story in which the plot was already written for me so you can see where I'm coming from...

Anyway so this story is if there was a Greek exhibit in the Museum of Natural History (and no, I barely know shit about Greek history, shh), and one of the wax figures raised a little hell and kind of accidentally fell in love with a dead dude.

Enjoy!

*also another disclaimer, i don't own anything but my character Theodosia!*