Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I wouldn't mind the idea I told him...
What was wrong with me? Why was I falling for someone I just met? Especially a BOY I just met. Clearly I was losing my mind, there's no other explanation. I mean yeah I know I said I've kissed a boy before but did I say I like it? Cuz I actually didn't. It feels even weird though because is it wrong to give up a crush on someone to get a crush on someone else? I don't even know, it's hurting my brain and my mother yabbling on the phone while driving me to school isn't helping at all. "Girlll you already know Linda ain't gonna do anything the whole shift.... Girl that's why I'm saying we need to write her oompla loompa body ass up" I roll my eyes at my mother's ridiculous work drama. I didn't even ask for her to drive me to school I'm perfectly fine walking to school like usual. But my mother insisted that she was gonna take me to school to protect me just in case the shooters know I'm friends with Gustavo and want to harm me. But again I can look after myself.
My mom finally pulls up to the entrance to my school and gets off the phone but before she can say anything to me I get out the car and pace straight to the entrance door but in the background I hear my mom call my name "Nash bring yo ass back here I was going say something to you!" I roll my eyes as people walking into school laugh as though it's funny. I turn around and waking towards the car and see what's up with my mother. My mother sticks her head out the window and speaks "Nash what is wrong with you? You're usually more joyful." At her words I think about Gustavo being in the hospital and my confused feelings about Luca so I let it all out without control. "Gustavo's in the hospital and I got confused feelings for some person that I don't even know that well so no I'm not joyful right now" I exclaim. "Oh Nash I'm sorry" My mother signs "I know there's a lot going on but just lift your head up and don't give the answers will come to you." I chuckle a little... "What's funny?" My mother asks looking confused.
"It's nothing I'm sorry for brushing you off thx and I love you Mom" I say "I love you too Nash... Welp I'mma finna go home and watch The Proud Family" I shake my head laughing and wave bye to her as she leaves the school area. My mom's right things can get better if I just lift my head up. I take a deep breathe and walk into the building...
The week goes by pretty fast, kinda crazy to think that there's only one more week of school left before summer break. All I've been doing is practicing hard for these dumbass finals all week.. my mother says she hates finals she believes finals doesn't teaches kids how to learn it only teachers us how to take a test which I agree but I don't really care I just want my masters degree 😂. And what also would really like is if Gustavo could get out the hospital because this whole week it's been akward sitting alone with Ashanti all she ever does is talk about Gustavo and watches YouTube videos, I mean I know I could hang out with my basket ball team members but they are a little too rough at the lunch table. They be wrestling and slapping each other and all that rough boy shit. Like damn I'm a scrawny ass nigga I wouldn't be able to last a day at their table. A couple times me and Ashanti's eyes meet while eating our lunch I always quickly try to avert my gaze, clearly you can see me and Ashanti are still have not processed that situation that happened after our shift at 'chick fil a'. Also another thing is that I haven't exactly been responding to Luca's messages I've been ignoring them on purpose 😩. It's just that with Gustavo in the hospital, Awkward moments with Ashanti, practicing for finals and still tryna figure out what my feelings are even like toward Luca it's being pretty heavy for me. I look through dozens of messages from him asking where I'm at , why I'm not replying and how he's sorry for whatever he's done everyday but I still haven't said anything. I'm just done with everything I need a pause in life right now but that all changes for me one day...
