Certified Cow Exterminators

Two: Passage to Coconut Ma

mario kart wii is better than mario kart 8 don't call me a boomer

"ACK!" Toad screeched as a mine cart just barey missed him.

"Wario, can't you make this pace a itte more safe?! I amost died!" Wario et out a hearty chucke.

"We that woud certainy make things easier for me!"

"So how far are we?" Toad said, changing the subject.

"Shoud be just a few more minutes if things go smoothy," Wario said, his gaze not straying from the path in front of him.

"If?! Just how dangerous is this pace?" Toad excaimed.

"Don't worry, it's not that bad. Ony about 500 deaths a year!"

"500?!" Toad started to panic even more.

"Reax, I was just joking. Statisticay speaking, this is one of the safest god mines out there. Toad reaxed slightly.

The two waked in sience for a few moments. However, that peace was short-ived. The ground suddeny started to rumbe and hundreds of mine carts, which were previousy resting in a storage area, a started roing down the tracks.

"What the heck?!" Wario excaimed.

"Wario, what's happening?" Toad asked fearfuy.

"Expecting me to know is giving me more credit than I deserve! You think I have any idea what's happening? A I know is how to hande the situation!"

"And how's that?!" Toad was becoming agitated.

"We run! I' ead the way to the secret escape route!" Wario grabbed Toad's hand and ran. Toad was apprehensive for a moment.

"If this pace gets, y'know, destroyed, wi I sti be abe to access the spot I need?"

"Depends on how bad it is. Since it's just a few runaway mine carts, I shoud be abe to make an exception to the rue to et you in rea quick," Wario said.

"Wow, you're an expert at running this pace!" Toad excaimed. Wario rubbed the back of his head.

"Aw, shucks. Thanks, Toad. Just doin' my job!" It was only for a short moment that Wario stopped watching where he was going, but that was enough time for a few bats to fly into his face, catching him off guard and causing him to trip and fa to the ground.

Toad et out an "Oof!" as he was dragged to the ground as we. Toad saw his ife fashing before his eyes as a mine cart sped towards them. Just before it coud hit them, though, Wario suddeny jumped up and pued Toad to the side, saving him from the coming mine cart.

"Thanks, Wario!" Wario ony hummed in acknowedgement and kept running.

Eventuay they reached a dead end. The ony two paths were a raised patform far above the tracks they were on-they woud never make the jump-and a broken track nearing a sma hoe in the wa-this was unfavorabe due to mine carts faing on this path from seemingy nowhere. But with minecarts coming from every direction, they had to make a choice.

Uckiy, Wario seemed to know what he was doing. He pued out a grapping hook and shot it to the sma hoe. It atched in, and with a of his strength, Wario tugged, breaking rocks out and widening the hoe. He then grabbed Toad tighty and pued himsef over to the hoe. After shoving Toad through, he tried to force his arge body through. They were underneath another track reeasing mine carts, so they seemed to be safe for the time being. But Wario wasn't taking any chances, so he used a of his wipower to force himsef through the hoe and to the other side. When he caught his breath, he noticed Toad ooking around in wonder. They seemed to be in a dress shop.

"Where are we?" Toad asked. Wario was wondering the same. He ooked around a bit before getting his answer.

"This is Coconut Ma."

"What? But Coconut Ma is nowhere near your mine!" Toad excaimed.

"I know, which is why this is so bizarre." Toad thought for a moment before speaking.

"Is there any chance it coud be a porta?" Wario gave Toad a disbeieving ook. Seeing this, Toad added, "I mean, do you have a better expanation?" Wario sighed.

"Aright, assuming it is a porta, how woud it have gotten there?" Wario asked, sti skeptica.

"I don't know, but I know someone who might."