My Problems Are Never Solved(L.S)

O N E

Authors note:
Contains:(WARNING! MUST READ!)
-Abuse
-Talk about suicide or attempted suicide
-Smut
-Language
-Boyxboy
-Self harming
-These boys are very feminine, (Eli and Nathan)so leave if this ain't your cup of tea.
-No hate coming from any of the names mentioned/used at all
-Plus, this isnt a futuristic story..so yeh

I personally dont have any of this, and those who do, I wish you best of luck on the road to recovery. So if I end up on something about any of these subjects that is incorrect, please DM me please so I can know for the future.
I don't tolerate hate. Leave if it's not your cup of tea. Bye~Angel_Cake32
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Hi. I'm Eli Harper. Yes, the Eli Harper. Prince of Doncaria. Let me explain my life.

You know,

people often think that life can not go wrong in any ways. I thought that too. I thought my life could not get any worse until I met Noah. Until that, I was waited on hand and foot.

Waited on because I am royalty. When I met Noah, my life was no longer dull. I was finally happy, but no one has to know just yet. Let's go back, when my life was once dull...

But, I dont want to start here. I really want to get into my past of a childhood. I was born December 24th. As a 'gift' my mum and dad had once said.

Notice how I said once. Now being a hier to the throne, having a disgrace as a step-mother, and a horrible father, now king. I really hate both of them.

My mother died at age 32, as I was just 13. 'I was broken' is such a understatement. I was depressed so much, to the point I tried multiple times to end my life just to see my mother.

Life was hell. My dad blamed me for having her end her life. I didn't know why she had done it. He slapped, hit, punched, and just used me as his verbal and physical punching bag.

At 15, I found out as to why my mother went down as she did. She had written a letter and hid it in my mattress.

Dear my beloved son,
I love you with all my heart. I look upon you every day as to see pure bliss in your face as you have taken so much care for Phoebe, Dasiy, Fizzy , and Lottie even if they are your older sisters. I understand I left you to your father but I had to. He verbally used me and cheated on me. Made my life a living hell x10. Beat me up, saying 'I was a horrible mother' or 'You will never be good enough for this world. I am lucky to even be seen with him.' I hope your are not in the same situation as me when I am gone. Hopefully your father will see the better light of things. I realize you find me selfish, but I did it for all of you. My cuts, my 2 miscarriages, my bruises, my pain, all from your father and from the horrid group of people I call 'My birth family'. One day you will find this. I hope soon, and I love you. I really do. I love you LouBoo.
-Jay

I cried. Cried so hard I had sobbed until nothing came out. I was furious. I was angry. She only ever called me LouBoo. My sisters even knew to never call me that unless it was mum.

After I tried ending my life several times, I was so done until to the point I was done trying. Just waiting, for my last breath. My 'father' saw me struggling. He saw me. Nothing.

How could she leave me? Why would she leave me? Is all I asked to myself. I prayed and prayed. I wished to wake up to her coming in my room and waking me up with her soft voice.

My prayers were never answered. Never solved, never happened. I gave up hope on God. I didn't care if I was gay, he'd understand..right?

She wont be here for my coronation as a king. Not as I graduated school, or for my 16th birthday. I was never comforted. I was never told it's all right. How life will be okay. How the sun will still shine.