Circles

Chapter Forty Nine

            When I get back to the clearing and see Matthew, we both run up to each other and hug as if it’s all we have left in the world. Deep down, we both believed that the other wouldn’t come back.

            “How did your goodbye go?” Matthew asks me.

            “It was really sad,” I say. “I have to come back to see her baby eventually.”

            “I’m not worried about that far ahead right now,” he says. “I’m worried about tomorrow.”

            I nod. “I know. How was Nicole?”   

            He shakes his head. “She’s really mad. I don’t think she’s ever going to forgive me for this one.” He looks pained.

            “I’m sorry,” I say, giving him another hug.

            “Don’t be,” he says. “If she can’t understand this, then she isn’t my friend.”

            I shrug. “Want to try to sleep now?” He nods and we lay down on the blanket we left here. I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the rock I’m using as a pillow.

            “Morning, sunshine,” I say to Matthew.

            He groans. “I was hoping it was just a bad dream.”

            “If it was a bad dream, I wouldn’t be in it,” I tease.

            He sits up. “Fair enough. Anyway, I’m glad you woke me up. Do you have your money on you?”

            I check my pocket. “Yes. Why?”

            “You’re going to go buy us each a coat, a hat, a pair of boots, and a pair of gloves. I’m going to go buy food. Then we are going to sleep some more and leave at dark,” he says.

            “You keep saying leave,” I say quietly. “Leave and go where?”

            “Worry about it when it happens,” he says. “I haven’t decided yet. I have a few ideas.”

            I nod. “Okay, sounds good. Meet back here?”

            “One hour,” he says. “It’s not a long walk.”

            “Okay.” We split up.

            I get to the clothes store around noon and decide to shop for Matthew first. I find him a warm, heavy black coat that will keep the wind and rain out. After getting a matching hat and gloves for him, I go to the shoe department and get us both a pair of thick waterproof boots. Next, I go to the women’s section and find myself a purple coat that seems warm enough. I get myself a white hat and white gloves, and go up to the counter to pay.

            “Will that be all?” the cashier asks.

            “Yes, thank you,” I say, and hand her all of my money. She returns a small portion of it to me along with a big bag full of everything Matthew asked me to buy.

            “Have a nice day!” she chirps as I leave.

            “I’ll try,” I mumble to myself.

            I still have a half hour before Matthew will be back, so I decide it would be a good idea to wash up. There’s a public bathroom next door to the clothing store, so I go in and splash some water on my face and in my hair. I stare at my reflection and think about all I’ve gone through, not just in the last day, but since I left my parent’s Circle; since I turned sixteen. Right now, my parents are sitting home with their friends, eating lunch, and not even thinking about me. They probably assume that I’m fine; that I’m in a Circle, and I’m happily growing up. That isn’t true. I’m growing up, but faster than I should have to. I’ve known Matthew for almost four months, and they’ve been the hardest months of my life, but I love him. It’s worth it.

            Realizing I lost track of time, I finish up in the bathroom and run back to the woods to find Matthew lying on the blanket.

            “Did you buy the stuff?” he asks.

            “Yeah,” I say, tossing him the bag.

            He pulls out the coat and puts it on over his sweatshirt. “Perfect, thanks,” he says.

            I slide into my coat and pull my hat over my ears to keep them warm. I feel something cold land on my nose. “Is it snowing?” I ask, looking up.

            Matthew looks up, too. “Yeah. It’s never snowed here before,” he says. “Wow.”

            “I guess it’s just never been this cold,” I say.

            “Guess not.”

            We both change into our boots and put our sneakers in the bag as the snow starts to fall quickly. It’s beautiful.

            “The snow is sticking to your hair,” Matthew says. He laughs. “It’s pretty.”

            I smile. “I love you.”

            “I love you, too.”

            We lay down on the blanket, and it’s already damp with snow, but it’s all we have.

            “Try to get some sleep,” Matthew says. “We leave in eight hours. Make it count.”

            I nod and close my eyes.