Loco-Oscar Diaz

Epi.13

Three weeks later.

Oscar has been blowing up my phone still, I can't even imagine even saying hello to him. I don't want to think about him anymore. I tried to outwit the bad, but that bit me in the ass. He's been leaving me food with sorry notes on my door step. Which pisses me off, like I'm trying to get over you asshole. I don't even know how he even got my address. I've been talking to a old friend named Travis. See, I've know him since highschool and when I was staying with Jesus and Daniella he came over visiting Jesus. I was crying and listening to Etta James, he walked on me. He comforted me and he help me sort out my feelings. He's been patient and he confessed to me last week, but I feel horrible. Though I let him down, I mean what will his family think. A pregnant girl talking to their son, who by the way could go get someone a lot better. I don't know what to feel and I'm numb to everything, but I know my worth.
I'm looked as fast now, I'm not even in my mid twenties and I'm having a kid. I can't lie and say I don't feel bitter against Oscar, he can leave and restart a life. I'm stuck. Rosalía you didn't take the pill or know if he himself was on a pill too. But I just wish I never met that man, my life has turned upside down because of him.

I've been getting more morning sickness and I've just been tired. Though if I push through it, I think I can go through it by myself. I got a new job at the local elementary school. I thought I'd hate it but it's been a life lesson. I thought working at those rich schools I wouldn't have to deal with bad kids, but all kids are different. Seeing Cesar...It taught me that theses kids here are better than those who get the easy way out of life. They have to fight harder to get what they can get, but they appreciate it. And I have been happy with my students, there's bad days but everyone has bad days. I have gotten a apartment not far from Abuela. She's warming up to me and she excited to be a great grandmother. Mom is coming from Brentwood when she gets time off from the firm, but I don't see her coming anytime soon.

Daniella and Jesus have gotten a blessing from God, they're getting a house in Brentwood. I'm actually genuinely happy for them, they can raise a family in a safer environment. I'm just sad that I'm not going to see my best friend as much as I can see her usually. I've know her since I was picking my nose on the swings. I smooth out my dress for Dani and Jesus goodbye party. I grab my purse, keys, phone and leave my crib locking the door.
-
I pull up kinda far from the house, there's a bunch of cars parked in front of the yard and everything. I get out of the car and lock it.

"Rosalía." A familiar voice called out making me tense up.

Goosebumps flourish on my body. Just ignore him Rosalía he will disappear soon. I clutch my purse in my arm and let my heels click on the pavement. I hear his footsteps and I'm feel everything inside of me tear down slowly. Before I can get a glimpse of him I shut my eyelids. I can't look at him or I might forgive him instantly.

"Rosalía please." He says and I feel his warm rough hand on my cheek.

I wanted to hold onto his hand too, but I shove him away. I turn around but open my eyes to face that broken down neighborhood. I can hear his sobs, but I stop. And I say it for they both of us.

"Sorry can't save your ass..."

With that I walk off. I feel weak and worn out by that. It took everything not to give into that man, but he didn't even give in to Cesar. So the day he does, thats when I know he has it balanced. When I make it to the front door, Travis is standing there smoking by himself. Without another second I cry into his chest.

"Hey it'll be okay sweets." He says and rubs my back gently.

I let it all out till I can talk.

"I saw him...well I didn't...I heard and felt him. I miss him but I shouldn't... he is bad for me." I sob.

It gets quiet and he just looks straight ahead. I think he knows more than what I even know.

"Rosalía don't depend on that man so much you're stressing yourself out and the baby. Stop it." He say simply but wisely.

I quietly nod and rest my head on his chest as he rocks the both of us side to side. He lets me wipe my tears before we go in the house to celebrate Daniella.