|Prologue: The Test|

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One time.

It was only one time.

This can not be happening after only one stupid, irresponsible, spur of the moment.

This is wrong.

It has to be.

I tap it with my wand again.

And that not-so-comforting word appears up again, blue and bulging.

Positive.

I throw the small white stick onto the ground in an act of denial and shock. I am sixteen years old – I'm not old enough to become a mother! I barely know how to tie my shoes right for crying out loud!

I pick up the pregnancy test again, tap it with my wand once more, as if expecting it to say "only joking Rose, but we had you going, didn't we?"

But it doesn't. It says the same thing it did the last four times I checked.

I sit down on the edge of the bath and notice for the first time how much my hands are shaking. I decide that I'm never going to leave this bathroom again. Perhaps I will stay here forever – yes, this bath seems like an ideal place to sleep – and ignore the new life that is apparently growing in my womb.

Because everyone knows that if you ignore something enough, it will go away.

I could live on toothpaste and shampoo – although, I doubt that is a good combination for my unborn child.

MY UNBORN CHILD?

WHY AM I BEING SO BLOODY CASUAL???

I start to hyperventilate and think that I am most certainly about to die. I am literally shouting at myself in my own head! Maybe I'll come back as a ghost, like Moaning Myrtle. I could haunt this sixth year Gryffindor girls' bathroom – Rose Weasley, the pregnant ghost of Gryffindor house. That has a nice ring to it.

And if I don't die and do someday decide to leave this bathroom, at least one person is going to die because of my foolishness.

The first and most obvious victim is Scorpius Malfoy – he's as good as dead already. Someone has to find out who the father of my baby is, and when they do, Scorpius is going to get one hell of an arse-kicking by my father, my grandfather or one of my many male cousins - and perhaps some of my female ones too. It's quite likely that James and Al Potter will get to him first. So then I'll be a single mother. Well actually, I'm pretty much facing that prospect any way.

And of course my parents will have to find out. Mum will either kill me or kick me out of the house. I'll have to live in some Muggle caravan park with my fatherless baby. And James and Al will be in Azkaban for murder. Lily will go off the wall if they go to prison – the only reason she doesn't have about twenty guys on the go is because her two older brothers have scared every single bloke in Hogwarts away from her.

And what about Hugo? Mum and Dad will break up because she kicked me out/killed me and then Hugo will have to live in a hostile environment, leading him to a life of sex, drugs and rock n' roll. He'll be dead by his fifteenth birthday.

And Harry and Ginny's two boys will be in prison and their daughter will be pregnant/STI-ridden/in Azkaban too/dead. That will be the Potter family broken up for sure.

And my cousin Fred will probably end up in Azkaban if James and Al are there because he likes to follow the crowd. Which means his little sister, Roxanne will join Lily in the brothel they're going to work in. Which means Aunt Angelina and Uncle George will resort to a life of alcoholism and crime because their son is a convict and their daughter is a prostitute.

And then Uncle Percy won't be able to live with the shame that has come with being a Weasley, so will jump of a bridge. Audrey will be left to raise their daughters Molly and Lucy (one of which, I'm sure, will be suffering from severe depression having just lost their father and the majority of their cousins to either suicide, prison, brothels or STD's) and will go off on a drinking binge with George and Angelina.

Uncle Charlie will be okay considering he's in Romania and will have no idea what is going on.

Finally, Dom will be visiting my trailer park/grave and thus will be disowned for visiting the black sheep of the family. Louis will probably miss his older sister and move in with her in her dingy London flat (which is where she'll be living after Bill and Fleur disown her for putting flowers on my grave/vegetable patch). Victoire will pretend not to know any of us and run off to, I don't know, the Lebanon with her boyfriend, Teddy. Then Bill and Fleur will be so upset that all of their children are gone that they'll try to replace them by having hundreds and hundreds of more kids.

Then Fleur will get extremely fat and develop a very severe eating disorder, leading to the eventual suicide of Uncle Bill.

And if Nana Molly and Grandad Arthur survive all of this, I'll eat my sock.

Wow, we really should have used a condom.

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