No More Mister Niceton

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Al looks awful on the morning of the Quidditch match. He's got circles under his eyes so dark it looks as if someone's punched him. His hair is even messier than usual, sticking up every which way and it looks as if he hasn't washed it all week. He's drank so much pumpkin juice, he's now shaking from the sugar rush. He is sitting at the Slytherin table this morning to show a sense of team spirit, and he's glaring over at the Ravenclaws with more contempt than he's ever shown for any other Hogwarts house.

I have to say, the Ravenclaws look far better than the Slytherins. They look like they've gotten a good night's sleep and are smiling and joking happily with each other. Robert and Jenny are sitting together, stealing a few kisses from each other that I'd think were sort of cute if I didn't feel so much for my cousin. Even the Hufflepuffs are sporting blue and silver today – the Hufflepuffs are notorious for supporting the Ravenclaws no matter what. Usually the Gryffindors are notorious for supporting whatever team is opposing the Slytherins – and there are quite a few Gryffindors wearing the Ravenclaw colours – but the Weasley/Potter family are all supporting Slytherin today. On top of the fact that Al is the captain of the team, we'd like Slytherin to win because it'd make for a much better final.

I join the boys at the Slytherin table this morning. Al isn't eating breakfast, but is mumbling incoherent things while staring at his toast. Henrietta Flint, an intolerable tree of a girl and also the keeper on the Slytherin team, looks worse than I've ever seen her. She's deathly pale and her eyes are all puffed up, as if she's spent the night crying rather than sleeping.

"What's wrong with Flint?" I ask Scorpius, who also looks worse for wear. He glances over at her, looking up from his bowl of cereal for the first time.

"Al called her fat," Scorpius shrugs, "She was eating a Cauldron Cake during practice last night."

"He called her fat? I thought James was the prick of the Potter family."

"After this week, Al has definitely out-pricked him," says Scorpius bitterly. I rub his arm comfortingly, but I really don't think I'm helping.

A whole hour before the match is due to begin, Al rounds up the Slytherin team and drags them down to the stadium for a 'pre-match pep talk'. I head back over towards the Gryffindor table, but stop when I hear someone calling my name.

"Rose!"

It's Jenny. She's beckoning me over to sit with her and Robert at the Ravenclaw table – the enemy. Knowing I can't just ignore her, I reluctantly go and sit beside her.

"Are you excited about the match?" she beams, "I can't wait. Robert's been training so hard all week. You'll be going for Ravenclaw, of course?"

Usually, I would say yes. Two months ago, when she was going out with Al and I wasn't going out with Scorpius, I might have said yes, of course.

"Yes, of course!" I lie through my teeth. Because I'm not going for Robert. I'm going for Al.

"That's good to hear!" Robert smiles. He is so very handsome when he smiles. Al has quite a crooked smile, sort of lopsided and goofy. It's definitely not as charming as Robert's. Like I've said before – Al doesn't stand a chance. "So Rose, how far in are you in your pregnancy? My older sister's pregnant too, she's only three months in."

I sort of feel like he's getting a bit personal now. Okay, plenty of people ask how far I am in, it's what people ask pregnant women when they have absolutely no idea what to say. But I've only spoken to Robert a handful of times. But instead of replying 'none of your business', I answer, "Seven months, almost."

"Wow, you won't find it coming!" he smiles. Why does he have to be so nice about everything? And Jenny is so nice too. They're a horrible couple – they're the Nicetons. And they'll live in a nice little cottage and have nice little children with nice smiles and Jenny's nice curly hair. They'll have a cat and a dog, both as well behaved as their nice little children, and Robert will put a tyre swing in the back garden for Jenny Jr. and Robert Jr. to swing on. And they'll have a nice little sign in the front garden saying 'Welcome to the Nicetons!' It will be unimaginably creepy.

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