Beginners guide to love a nutjob

Chapter 1: Mr. Grumpypants and the sleepy barista

To say Derek was pissed was an understatement. His so called best friend gave his usual spot in professor Harris' lecture to his evil girlfriend Erica and now he had to go on a journey through the auditorium to find a seat Bilbo Baggins-style. Thanks a lot, Vernon!

After some 'You can't sit there, I'm waiting for my friend' - excuses and even one self-flattering cheerleader type who said she 'has a boyfriend' (bitch please, I'm a werewolf, I can litterally hear you lie), Derek finally laid eyes on an empty seat. He sat down, startling the guy next to him, who had been sleeping on his folding table. Derek had never noticed the other boy before, but now he had it was hard to un-notice him. And not necessarily in a good way...

The guy pulled a can of Red Bull from his bag and popped the lid from the coffee cup he was already sporting. Derek's eyes nearly popped out of his head when he opened the can and poured it into the coffee. The boy must've noticed Derek was looking, because he gave him tired smile and raised his cup. "I'm going to die", he mumbled, before downing the whole thing.

After that Derek decided not to look in the kid's general direction, he instead focused on the professor who had just entered the room. Halfway through the lecture though, Coffee-guy groaned, "That man is the human incarnation of period cramps." It was true, professor Harris was everything but a pleasant person, but Derek would've never thought of such a specific way of describing him. "We could always make him disappear, make it look like an accident", Derek muttered almost subconsciously.

When he looked up, the guy was looking at him with a huge grin and wonder in his now glowing golden eyes, "That doesn't sound half bad." Derek rolled his eyes, "I was joking, doofus." "Hey, I'm not one to brag, but I'm proud I made it out of bed this morning! So don't you judge my perception of things right now, Mr. Grumpypants." Who even is this guy?, Derek thought, deciding not to go into it any further.

After the lecture, a guy with shaggy black hair approached. "Hey bro, oh god, you look miserable." Coffee-guy chuckled, "Yeah well, love you too, Scotty." Mr. puppy-eyes (Scott apparently?) frowned, "Seriously Stiles, do you sleep anymore?" Coffee guy flung one of his way too long arms around his friends shoulders, starting to steer him towards the exit, "Sure do, I scheduled a nap for a week from next Tuesday." Derek almost chuckled. Almost.

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Derek thought that would be it. He'd sit next to a really weird guy for a couple of hours a week and the rest of his life would be as plain and normal as always. He was wrong, because Stiles suddenly seemed to be everywhere. One time, Derek caught a glimpse of him in the hallway while he was talking to a redhead who looked extremely bored with the situation until Jackson Whittemore AKA King Ninnyhammer draped an arm around her shoulders. "Hey, Stilinski, are you still gay?" "Oh, nah, I forgot to pay my gay bill this month, so they cut me off... Of course I'm still gay, jackass!", Stiles snarked disgruntledly.

Another time he saw Stiles from the other end of the campus' park, making aggressive gestures while he was talking to Scott. Derek picked up their conversation with his wolf hearing. "No Scott really, I swear, if I hear someone sing Hamilton in the bathroom one more time, I'm joining them in that damn shower to drown them myself." Scott snorted, "No, you aren't. Worst thing you could do is join them in the shower and start singing Les Misérables just to bug them." Stiles grinned, "You're right, that sounds like something I'd do."

The last time Derek saw him was when Erica had blackmailed him into getting her and Boyd coffee. He was just about to queue up when he realized the barista looked very familiar. It was Stiles calling out the names written on the cups. "One espresso for Jack?" Jackson Whittemore (seriously that guy...) came up to the counter with an evil grin. "Took you long enough, Stilinski." Stiles rolled his eyes before plastering a fake smile on his face.

"Here you go, Jackson, a fresh cup of fuckoffee with one splash of 'no one cares', A dash of 'kiss my ass', some 'fuck you' and just a pinch of 'go to hell'." Whittemore scowled as he stomped away. Derek was up to order next, "Are you that nice to all of your customers?", he asked sarcastically. "Grumpypants! Nah, only to Jackson", he leaned over the counter as if to tell a huge secret and whispered, "He's an asshole." Derek rolled his eyes, "Why does you working in a coffee shop make so much sense?"

Stiles really seemed to think about it, "I don't know...", then he perked up with a sudden curiosity. "What amount of caffeine is deathly? Asking for myself, I'm actually worried." Derek stared at him unblinkingly, "Are you clinically insane or just incredibly annoying?" Again, Stiles really seemed to consider the question, "I don't know... probably both!" Derek sighed, "Whatever. Can I have a black Americano for Derek?" "Oh... So you're THAT kind of person." Derek raised an eyebrow, What does that mean?" Stiles grinned, "Nothing, anything else?" Derek nodded, "Two lattes for Erica and Boyd." Stiles cocked his head, "Didn't take scary blonde Catwoman for someone who liked milk in their coffee...", he dozed off for a second but then perked back up, "Your order will be right up!"

Five minutes later, Derek stood on the curb in front of the coffee shop with three cups and a confused look on his face. How could one person possibly be this annoying and still seem so interesting? He dismissed the train of thoughts and walked back to campus, it'd take some more classes to figure Stiles Stilinski out. And Derek almost smiled at the thought. Almost.

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'Sup guys? Miss me?

Here's the new story I've been promising for, let's see... the past month!

I'm really happy with how it's turning out and I really enjoy writing it, so I hope you guys have just as much fun reading it.

I'm planning on making it quite a bit longer than The sheriff's boy, so yay!

Catch you on the flip side!

XXX-HY_13

"This is espresso, you know? It's like coffee-zilla" - Dean McCoppin, The Iron Giant (1999).