𝐉𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐞'𝐬 𝐆𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐆𝐮𝐧

new minds: part two

𝐈 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐃 𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 other curious onlookers, the same ones I had met at dinner the day prior. I still remembered none of their names, but I recognized the boy with the shy smile and, of course, Avery, who had opened one eye at the mention of my name.

Glad I could scrounge up some sort of reaction.

"As I'm sure you all know, Janie is new with us," Dr. Alaya explained, making her way towards me and beckoning for me to stand.

I hesitated for a moment before rising to my feet, meeting Dr. Alaya's outstretched hand and shaking it firmly.

"Let's do what we can to make her welcome here," she called out, but her eyes were on me.

I needed no one to make sure that I was welcome. It'd be better if everyone just stayed away, but I couldn't go saying that at my first meeting.

"If you need anything, you come to me or one of the orderlies. We'll be keeping an eye on you, of course, but we're at your beck and call for any personal matters." She smiled, winked, and released my hand, making her way back to the front and taking all of the eyes with her.

I wondered if I should tell her that one of the patients knew a spot where there were no eyes that could watch us.

I took a look at Greta and pursed my lips, wondering what that was all about. She only shrugged and moved her gaze back to Dr. Alaya.

I sighed and did the same. Hopefully this went by fast, because I was ready for lunch and to get the hell out of this entire ordeal.

"I'm glad to see that almost everyone brought their journals today. If you have yours, please open it to the last, empty page, and grab your pens."

I did what I was told, only to realize that while Fawn had brought a journal, she had brought no utensils. I looked to Greta for help. She caught my look and laughed silently, handing me a black ink pen from her pocket.

Grateful, I inclined my head, catching the last part of whatever Dr. Alaya was saying.

"...write something simple down on the last page of your journal. Something that you associate with freedom. While you are all free to do what you please here, you are still under lock and key and under orders. It does not have to be long, in fact, a single word will do. Just write the goal you are trying to reach by the time you are finished writing in this journal. What freedom are you striving for?"

A lot of things came to mind. I thought about wanting to go to college without my backstory to follow me around. Then I thought how I wanted it to stick with me so that when people saw me, they thought, that's Janie Greene. You don't mess with her.

Then Noah came to mind. I wanted him to mess with me, in a good way. To tease me and not be afraid of the outcomes. To get to know me without thinking he already did.

I wondered if he was thinking about me, too. Our interaction had been so brief I highly doubted it, but, still. I wondered if he was around town looking for my face, and how he would feel when he didn't find it.

I saw the small T I had found earlier on the back cover. I tilted my head and wondered if that T belonged to the owner of this journal or maybe someone else.

Before I could stop myself, I traced the smallest N onto the bottom corner of the page. For now, that is what I was associating with freedom.

"When you're done, make your way to the next freshest page you have. Today we're going to be dealing with 'points.' What points in your life have led you here, what points will lead you to the goal you wrote on the last page, and what will you do once you've reached your goal? Write your freedom word on the middle of the page and begin. I'll be walking around checking on you."