Therapy

She's Awake

*Mary's p.o.v*

The second I read the message that Demi is awake I run to the room. I almost miss it as I ran too fast almost passing the door. 

I walk into a room and there's an awkward yet comfortable silence. 

"Mary" Demi says in her little weak voice.

Why does she make me so whipped? I have to refrain myself from flirting with her or kissing her, the doctor said it and I'm sure my therapist wouldn't like me to just go back to her like nothing happened. The only way me or Demi will recover is by letting things happen through time. 

I give her a small smile and sit next to her. She tries to reach her arm around me and I give her a hug. I try not to cry but I can feel my body tremble trying to keep in any tears. 

She smelled like must but this time it was mixed with the hospital smell. The smell of sickness or death. Or over cleaned floors and equipment. 

When I get out of the hug I look at her. She looks into my eyes and I feel my heart melt. Why must her brown eyes do that to me? 

"Oh gosh, I know that look, the disappointment..." She speaks softly.

"A little but that's not important right now." I try brushing it off. 

"It is, I'm sorry... I didn't think this could happen to me, I thought I knew my limit but I guess I was wrong." She starts caressing my arm.

I take that as a sign to move to the seat. I didn't want her to think it was that easy. She needs help before me and her can get into any relationship. 

"Demi, you need help, I could've lost you, Max would've been left with one mom, Maddie would have lost her sister, your fans-"

"I know" she says looking down at her fingers. 

"I'm glad you're alive. But please...please get help" I pleaded. 

"Okay I will."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

She signaled for me to come back into her embrace. I have to keep myself away. She's probably confused.

"Demi, rest your arms, your body went through a lot within the last 24 hours." I try to excuse the fact that I won't hug her again.

"Yeah you're right." She said hesitantly. 

I hated seeing her on the hospital bed. The only time I wanted to see here here again was because she was giving birth to our inseminated daughter or son. 

"Ah you're awake." The doctor said as he walked in. He slowly grabbed Demi's arm.

"As you know, you had an overdose, it was a cocktail of medication and drugs, you also suffered a seizure and heart attack, which means we are going to monitor you longer than the mandated 3 days. You will have a psych evaluation and we will be giving you medication for your anxiety and blood thinners to prevent any other heart attack." He said to her.

She started to panic at the thought that she had a heart attack and seizure. The doctor tried to reassure her that she would be taken care of and that she'd be okay. 

After the doctor left Demi seemed desperate for comfort. Her mom was already comforting her but it seemed like it wasn't enough. I  broke my pride and decided to hold her. 

"I'm sorry Mary, I didn't think this would happen, I'm so sorry, I still love you, I don't want to lose you." She held onto my hand crying her eyes out. I'm surprised she even had energy to cry. 

"I know Demi, I love you too, you won't lose me." I said rubbing circles on her back. 

She tried to lean in for a kiss but I moved my head back. 

"We aren't back together Demi, you can't expect me to just drop everything and act like nothing happened, I'm here to support you right now, but as a friend, nothing more." I  said sternly. 

It took me by surprise that I  was able to actually get myself to not fall into her arms and stay whipped letting her walk over me again. She need help, that's what's important. 

Demi just nodded in agreement. She bit her lip and I knew she was trying to hold back her tears again.

*Demi's p.o.v*

I  could hear the faint beat of a familiar song. It was the same song you hear at a club, but when it comes down to it, when you're high as fuck all of the songs sound the same. 

I lost count of the different drugs I used tonight. I just wanted to be higher than I ever was before, plus I know my limit. 

I didn't know how to deal with life. The past was lingering in my thoughts so much I thought I was going to go crazy. My fans expect me to be their idol and a good role model but I really am only human. All the fans that tell me they recovered because of me, imagine how disappointed they'd be if they knew I wasn't sober and I was getting high everyday all day long. 

My mind began to race, my body went limp, the next thing I    remember was that everything went black. 

.....

I woke up and my body felt like it had been ran over by a truck. I    opened my eyes and see my mom. She had tears in her eyes which hurt my heart because I hate seeing my mama cry. 

"Demi you're awake" she said giving me an embrace.

"Momma I'm sorry" I said. 

"I'm just glad my baby girl is okay. We will talk about the next steps when you're feeling a bit better." She slightly smiled at me.

"Momma, where's Mary?" 

I know I shouldn't expect Mary to be here after everything I put her through but I feel like she would be the only person who can actually get me to calm down. 

As I finish the sentence Mary walks in. She looks at me and I can tell by her eyes there's a mixture of sadness and disappointment. 

She embraces me after I open my arms for a hug. I missed feeling her arms around me. The safeness was like no other. I wish I could feel this everyday but I messed it up. Maybe I can get her back. 

After I apologized to her, she gave me an answer that was unexpected but reasonable. I hated the fact that we could only be friends because I wanted to be much more again. James didn't make me feel the way she did. It felt so numb with him, the only time I could feel anything was when I was high.

But I knew that being friends was the best idea for us right now because I was too messy and she was doing too well for me to come and mess it up again. But when all this is over, I will get her back and I    will be the girlfriend or fiancé or wife Ive always wanted to be to her.