hate

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You and ruel planned a day out together so you decided to go to a theme park, it was really sunny so it was a perfect day and you had packed a picnic for you and ruel and were finally happy ruel was taking a day out for himself just to have fun instead of being in the studio all day worrying. You went on most of the baby rides first then the rollercoasters where you were practically ripping ruels arm off holding on to him for dear life.

You were walking around the amusement park and suddenly ran into a huge crowd of fans, swarming ruel to take pictures you politely moved to the side so everyone could take pictures, it was cute seeing them all so happy. Some of the girls kept looking at you so you smiled but they looked at you in disgust loudly saying comments as you tried to ignore them by going on your phone. They kept touching ruel to take more pictures. A few sweet ones did come up to you acknowledging you too which made you happy but you did feel a little awkward.

Ruel was chatting with the fans whilst one of the previous girls that stared at you came up to you, you smiled saying ' hi how are you?' thinking maybe they just had that face and wanted to talk. They quickly took a picture not saying much and you felt awkward but politely said ' it was nice meeting you', she stopped staring at you and said loudly ' your way too ugly for him, he'll leave you soon thankfully but your not worth shit' she walked off. Ruel was quite far from you but some other fans were close to you hearing what she said clearly and were taken back themselves. You were kinda shocked and didn't know what to do you felt a little upset but didn't want ruel to see.

You grabbed your bag and said to one of the sweet fans that was near you 'hey do you mind telling ruel I'll just be in the car if you get a chance?' She said sure and you could tell by her face she felt bad for you but didn't know what to say. You walked to the car quickly sitting in as you burst out crying, it's not because of what she said it's just you always used to feel so insecure about yourself once you started dating ruel, you never felt good enough to the point you hated yourself and always questioned your worth and not being enough for anyone, so how would you be enough for ruel? It took you time to build confidence in yourself and ruel reminding you everyday you were beautiful the way you were, he knew how bad you felt and hated it and helped you feel good about yourself always. You took out your phone and went on Instagram scrolling through ruels comments which you never did or even went on Instagram often. You read through ruels comments looking for the bad ones, just torturing your own self esteem, there was one picture of ruel, his family and management a whole group picture which you were standing next to ruel. Some comments were super sweet but your brain automatically fixed itself upon the bad ones, 'who is that ugly bitch next to ruel? She's so fat, ew why her? She just looks like a slut. He could do 1000x better. I hope he isn't with that' you cried even more feeling like a piece of shit.

You sat there overthinking it all and you knew in your head this was only making it worse for yourself but you didn't listen. You saw ruel from afar walking quickly to the car with a look of worry in his face, you definitely weren't gonna tell him what happened, how could you? He'd feel so guilty that we came here and it happened from his fans, so you acted normal. Ruel hopped in saying ' hey you okay babe?' You replied with a laugh ' yeah why wouldn't I be?'. He looked at your face with worry knowing something was off but you brushed it off. ' are you sure?'. ' yes I'm fine ruel, I just had something in my eye it's all red but come on let's go home'. He nodded and began driving, you kept feeling an urge to cry but fought it trying to forget it all.

Later that day, you were at ruels house and were on the PlayStation with coco, you were both laughing away and she was like your best friend, ruel was downstairs and scrolling through his phone looking at all the cute pics he was tagged in. Randomly he saw a video pop up with y/n in it and that girl who said all those rude things was caught on video. Ruel was mad angry and felt so bad with how upset y/n was and finally realised. He stormed upstairs to you and coco playing and said 'y/n come here' you were kinda taken back ruel looked so serious you wondered what was up.

'Y/n why didn't you tell me what happened at the zoo today?' He said with a sad face. You looked down and said ' I didn't want you to feel upset ruel it's fine I got over it'. Ruel looked at you and hugged you tight ' babe I know you've struggled with being confident, the things she said were hurtful and I saw how upset you were in the video, but none of it's true.' You then realised as to how ruel had known about it. You said nothing but ruel held your face an said 'your so beautiful and who cares what people say? Your mine so why would I ever want to listen to anyone else's opinion of you? Plus it's just jealousy, I love you for you, so don't think anything else of yourself, in fact your kinda too hot for me so I'm blessed you deal with me' he said making you laugh, you loved how ruels words made you feel 1000x better always. You hugged him as he put his head on yours and said 'I'm lucky that your mine' and he kissed you.

can't lie I feel like this became a bit shit but yeah

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