Unnatural Instinct: Abduction

20.

I'm glad you're enjoying this. And I'm very glad I give you pleasure after all the terrible things I did to you in the laboratory. But please don't try and convince me why I shouldn't feel the way I do.

This whole situation with you gnaws away at me in a spot somewhere deep within my guts. It's not that I don't like you, because I very much do. It's me I hate.

What have I done? What am I doing? If my seniors were to know about this, they would ostracize me from the scientific community. Not only that—my planet would ostracize me. My name will be mud. I will be a pariah. I am a pariah. People will whisper about me for generations to come.

'Do you remember that scientist who mated with his subject?' they will say. 'The one who used to be a great man?'

And they would be right to say it. 

You watch me sadly but you don't reach out for me and you don't say a word. I appreciate it. Let me deal with this in my own time.

We exit the bath. Neither of us speak as we get changed. I know my silence hurts you but I can't bring myself to say anything. I can't meet your sad eyes and it makes me feel worse.

When I'm fully suited, I pause. I work all day in the laboratory but now that I've decided to abandon my research there's nothing for me to do. The realisation paralyses me. I haven't lived a day without a goal or a routine.

My eyes fall on the specimen jar filled with the blue glow of my semen, and I feel a sudden surge of excitement. I don't have to abandon everything. As I march over to collect it, I feel your eyes on me, and finally I turn to look at you.

'Would you like to join me in some research?'

You hesitate. 'You mean on those two aliens?'

'No. They will remain asleep and unharmed until I can return them to their origins. My drones will take care of them in the meantime.'

Your eyes widen in surprise. You smile, then nod emphatically.

On our walk together, I briefly explain what I'm going to do. I take you to a compartment adjoining the lab. It's small already and it only gets smaller with the two of us squashed up together alongside the ship's central microreader.

'That's a microscope?' you say in awe. 'I've never seen one so big.'

It hangs from the ceiling and fills up almost half the room.

'It's much more than a microscope. It goes beyond anything you humans have managed to build. This can see beyond subatomic particles like electrons, protons and even quarks and quasars, to the very string quartex that makes them up.'

'The string quartex?' You shake your head. 'Never heard of it.'

I smile as I prepare the specimen for viewing. 'There are many things you don't know.'

You fold your arms with a challenging smile. 'Then you can teach me.'

I'm about to say how much I look forward to it when I suddenly realise how little time we have together. The thought hasn't troubled me before but since this morning things are so much different. At some point I'll have to send you back home. I'll never see you again.

I turn my face away before you can see what's troubling me.

When everything is ready I direct you to the seat by the lens. The seat's only small, meant only for one.

'Where are you going to sit?' you ask. 'Oh,' you giggle, shifting further to the front of the seat as I climb in behind you, my thighs on either side of your hips, my chest pressed up against your back. It's an awkward position and not conducive to productive study but I can't deny I'm enjoying it.

'Let me centre it,' I say, pulling the lens closer to my eye. It takes me several moments and when I have the slide in view, I pause in surprise. 'This can't be right.'

'What can't be right?' you ask in concern. 'Is there something wrong with your ... stuff?'

Using the dials on the side of the microreader I access its computerised memory. I quickly find a recording of a previous slide I had prepared in my early days as a scientist.

As I compare the two my heart beats faster.

'What's going on?' you say, sounding a little panicked. 'What's wrong?'

I pull back. 'Nothing. Nothing's wrong.' I understand your fears. My sperm is inside you, after all. This situation must be as frightening for you as it is for me. 'There's nothing to worry about. There's nothing wrong with my ... stuff.' I smile. 'Here.' And I push the lens over to you.

You laugh as you peer into it. 'So these are your little guys. They look ... different.'

'Yes. Unlike the sperm of your species, their heads are sloped and they're powered by two tails.'

'And they're blue! Wow,' you say. 'Look how quick they move.' You laugh. 'Eager to get somewhere.'

I flick a switch on the microreader. 'Compare it to the specimen I gave ten years ago.'

You pause as you look at the two slides intently. 'But they're hardly moving—and there are so few of them. They almost look ...'

'Dead,' I say.

You look back at me in surprise. 'Is that normal?'

'For my species it is. It's been like that for generations.'

'And you don't know why?'

'We have our theories.'

You look again into the microreader. 'So, what's made them change now?'

'I'd have to develop a study to be certain, but from what I can gather, I can safely hypothesise that it's because of you.'

You look at me again, dumbfounded. 'Me?'

As I look into your eyes the back of my neck prickles—in fear, in excitement. 'You've done something to me. Things are happening to me that have never happened before. I don't get erections. I don't get orgasms. I have never ejaculated. I don't feel ... these feelings. What we did this morning has not been performed by my species in hundreds of years.'

You think for a moment. 'But then, how did you give the first sample?'

'Via a needle through my testicle. We can't give samples so we have to take them.'

You wince. 'Ouch!'

'It's getting harder and harder for my species to procreate. Even with all our technology we fail at the most basic function of any multicellular organism—reproduction. In effect, we're dying.'

You stare at me. 'So ...' you nod at the microreader, 'what does this mean?'

'I'm not sure yet, but it's something I'm going to find an answer to.'