PROJECT NIRVANA | ONC2020 ✔️

Chapter 13.

I woke up to the glare of a familiar blue light raining down on my skin. That was when I realized that I lay on a metal bed, the hard surface pressing against my bones. The chemical scent of disinfectant seeped into my nostrils, causing me to feel dizzy. Nausea overtook me and I had to force myself not to vomit. I could already taste the acid as bile rose in my throat.

An annoying ringing sound bounced against my skull, forcing me to take a few minutes to recover. After I had regained my senses, I attempted to push myself up but my arms shook from the pressure, the muscles constricting from lack of use.

It was then that I noticed an unfamiliar weight resting on my head. It was a strange contraption constructed of heavy metal and wires. I was too scared to touch it, but I knew that it must play a part in operating the simulation. I'd watched enough movies to come to this conclusion.

I pulled myself up, dragging myself back so that I was leaning against the wall. It took a moment for me to catch my breath due to the strain. I didn't know how long it had been since I had used my real body. Reality and the imaginary had blended into each other, so I had no knowledge of time. I felt detached from the world, as if I were a floating particle, an outlier, that didn't belong.

Being in this room reminded me what I was. A test subject. The receiver of a groundbreaking discovery. I had never thought that this kind of technology could be possible, and that I would be one of the first to experience it.

Usually, this would be something to boast about, to be proud of, but I was only filled with emptiness and fear. My life in Nirvana had been a lie, but my real life had been more painful than I had ever imagined.

Now I knew why I had undergone the experiment. I had wanted a chance to be with Avron, without remembering all the things that had made our relationship feel wrong. I had wanted to forget what had happened in this world in order to live a distinguished life, One that was completely different from the one I had been allotted.

But now, I was back at square one. My memories had returned, and I would possibly have to make a decision the second time. The gravity of the situation was beginning to weigh me down.

My original plan to escape after waking up had flown out the window. I was much too weak and I believed Avron was experiencing the same predicament. It was poor judgement on our part for not taking this into account. I would just have to find another opportunity for us to leave this laboratory and return to the real world.

While I was occupied by my thoughts, a metal door at the corner of the room opened, revealing a young woman wearing a white lab coat. Short brown hair framed an angular face with forest green eyes. Her heels clicked loudly against the stone floor as she made her way beside me. I waited for her to introduce herself.

"My name is Dr. Morgan," she said after studying me for a moment. "And I'm the co-creator of the experimental simulation, 'Project Nirvana.'"

"What I just saw," I asked. "Was it just a dream?" I was glad that there was finally someone who could answer all my questions.

Dr. Morgan shook her head. "It was not a dream. I just gave you your memories back."

I lifted my face up. "You gave us our memories? They didn;t just come back to us?"

"It would have taken you months to gain them back," Dr. Morgan said."Surely, you didn't believe you would recover them just by walking into that ocean and waking up?"

I ignored her question. "You should just let me and Avron go. Your experiment can be considered a success, so you don't need us anymore."

Dr. Morgan raised a dark eyebrow. "You may think I don't need you, but you certainly need me."

"We can manage on our own," I replied. "You don't need to worry about us."

"The world is no longer how it was in the past," said Dr. Morgan. "Raging fires have burned most living things, turning them into nothing but ashes and the government has confined us to underground settlements for our comfort and safety."

"Even if the world has come to ruins, Avron and I still want to leave Nirvana," I said. "We're willing to face the reality."

"But you will live miserably," Dr. Morgan said. "Only those who are essential to the reestablishment of the world are given the privilege to completely enjoy these settlements. Your position as a test subject granted you that status; however, those without any specific talents are either sent to an underground farming facility or to the surface as a scout. Are you interested in participating in any of those activities?"

I was silent for a moment but then I remembered. "What about my mother? I can't leave her behind."

"Your mother is dead," said Dr. Morgan. "There is no reason for you to stay."

"You could be lying," I exclaimed. "You could just be trying to make me go back to Nirvana."

"She died before you went into the simulation," Dr. Morgan replied. "I thought it would be inhumane to make you relive that memory."

"Avron has already decided to return to the simulation after hearing that his mother was eventually arrested," Dr. Morgan continued. " I suggest you follow in his footsteps."

That was when I realized that there was no longer anything that tethered me to this world. It was naive to think that everything could return to normal. I had not even known how bad the situation in the real world was.

My eyes were dry despite the sudden news of my mother's death and fatigue weighed down on me like a load of heavy bricks. Reclaiming my life in Nirvana, was suddenly beginning to look very attractive.

I could forget the pain, no matter how cowardly that seemed. This wasn't cowardice, I told myself. It was being reasonable, realistic. It was the golden path to maturity.

"I'm nott the evil scientist someone might have implied that I am," said Dr. Morgan. "You shouldn't listen to Frazier; he's bitter about some personal conflicts we've had in the past. Just know that  I'm the only one that has your best interest in mind, the only person who understands how much of a positive impact the simulation can have on your life. Trust me."

It didn't take long for me to make my decision. "Send me back."