(Aksel's pov)
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I heard a small voice from behind me.
I turned my head and glanced around the kitchen to see who had spoken.
"Oh, uh hey Alex" I tried to keep my voice down as to not wake the others.
"Damn, I didn't think you'd be in here, its like 4am." Alex laughed quietly "I'm just uh- I'm getting food."
"Yeah, me too... me too." I said, raising my glass of water.
He opened the fridge and pulled out a yogurt and peeled the lid off. He licked the yogurt from the top of the lid and threw it out.
"So, whats shakin?" I said, sounding more awkward than I intended.
"Hmmph" Alex hopped onto the counter "Nothing" He looked to me "Just hungry."
God, I wish we weren't alone right now. The quiet night air kept us suspended in tension.
We sat in uncomfortable silence for a minute or two, before he finished his yogurt. "Okay, um, night.." He said, then took off towards his room that he shared with Hooverr and Ani, he slept on the ground while Hooverr the bed and Ani the couch, not that its important.
FUCK!! Why am I so awkward around him, I just want to talk to him and make him laugh and see him smile, like real smile around me. Instead it's silence. I mean, yesterday was great and all, we talked forever. But that was when we were with the group, and immediately when we got home we all went to sleep. I hope it's not all awkward and quiet when we're alone for the whole trip. Maybe he was just quiet because he didn't want to wake anybody up, knowing that he's a loud person.
I love him so much, I love him so much, I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
Okay, chill out. The plan is to make it through the week. We're just friends, I will treat him how I treat everyone else. I'll make jokes, I'll be cool. It's gonna be cool.
But what do I fucking do with all these feelings?? This sucks, and I can't even think of him without getting all flustered and blushing really red. He's just so perfect and funny and- I'm doing it again, I'm getting off track. All I want is to get over him.
I just want to get over him.
I put my glass in the sink and head over to the room I was staying in, with Brandon and Henry.
I took the couch in that room while they shared a bed, it was a pull-out couch so its not that bad.
That sucks for Alex, he has to sleep all alone on the cold floor.
I kept thinking about him until I eventually fell asleep.
That night I had a weird dream.
I couldn't really make anything out, it was foggy I think in the dream. I'm pretty sure Alex was there, though. Or at least I could feel his presence, his energy. Or maybe just the way I felt about him was there.
Anyway, I was walking somewhere, I felt confused and scared, like something was chasing me. I was walking bare footed on this really soft grass, it felt almost like carpet. I was walking and walking and suddenly I was running I was sprinting and all I could think was "Where's Alex? Is he okay? Where is he?" And then the dream was green and blue and suddenly I was falling, it was more like floating though. It was in slow motion for a second and all I can clearly remember is seeing Alex looking down at me. Expressionless. I felt oddly calm in that moment.
But then I was tumbling, I was falling at top speed. And the weird thing was it wasn't one of those dreams where before you land, you wake up. I landed, back first into some body of water. It was deep, and cold. I could still see Alex looking at me.
The dream faded out. The light leaving my sight as I sunk.
When I woke up to a sliver of light shining on my eyes, I felt better. Not good, but rested.
I turned my head to the sound of laughter coming from living room.
(Alex's pov)
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"sHUT UP!" I yelled jokingly as everyone started laughing at my shitty job making eggs.
"I'm not eating that, Alex" Brandon snickered.
"Okay, but how is it possible that you burned it, but some parts are uncooked?" Hoover burst into laughter.
"It's not even that funny you guys!" I said. They laughed even harder. I think they're all giddy or some shit from the little sleep we all got.
"Wait, thats technically cannibalism, you know cus you're a duck?" Henry giggled.
"Isn't it more like he's eating Aksel" Ani said.
"Wow thats really funny guys, really."
From behind me I could hear Aksels sweet sweet laughter. Oh, it's almost music.
"Oh, hey" I said, looking back.
The room giggled.
"Hiii Aksel!" Ani waved.
"Hey" he lifted his hand slightly.
He jumped over the couch next to where I was sitting.
We were close. So close.
"Look at these eggs Alex made" Brandon said leaning over to Aksel. He didn't seem too interested at first but then burst out laughing. I felt like screaming, he's just so fucking beautiful whatever he does!
"It's not even that funny you guys!" Of course they kept laughing. You'd think that after a good 10 minutes they'd shut up about it already. "Like at all!"
"Okay, so who's in favour of not letting Alex near the stove ever again?" Hoover said. Everyone agreed with him by giggling and saying "I"
:later:
I packed a whole bunch of snacks, my wallet, and my phone in my backpack, then threw it over my shoulder. We were all leaving to Disneyland.
"Aksel!" Henry yelled. "Hurry up! We're leaving!"
"I'm coming, I'm coming! Lemme put my shoes on." Aksel yelled back, from his room.
I heard the patter of his feet to the doorway, then clomping out of the door. By that point I was already waiting by the car, Aksel glided out of the door and into the car. Daylight fell onto his cheeks as he smiled at me through the window. I took a deep breath, and opened the car door.
Henry scooched next to me, pushing me in between him and Aksel.
I was crushed in the middle for the entire ride to Disneyland, but it wasn't so bad actually, next to Aksel. He smelled really nice, like vanilla, or sugar cookies maybe. And he made me laugh the entire ride there, we just click so well together, I guess. I almost forgot why I felt so awkward and weird around him, we were just friends for that small moment.
When we finally arrived at Disneyland and bought our day-passes and we were in the gates, we were immediately lost. Disneyland is huge! And we are very small, well, they are very small. I'm a chad. Anyway, being very misguided without a fucking map didn't stop us from trying all the rides around us, in fact it felt like a leverage. We found ourselves on rollercoasters, although less exhilarating than last year, still very enjoyable. At merch shops filled with Elsa dolls and stuffed Simbas (I bought a pair of Mickey ears just because of the whole spirit of the day). And at food stands many times.
During the lineup at space mountain, there was some sort of issue with the ride, which fucking sucks because we were already waiting there for like 8 million hours, so we had to wait longer. We were sat in the blistering sun with nothing to do but lean against the poles dividing the lineup. But for some reason it wasn't so bad. Aksel was standing right next to me, beaming his big smile, my heart felt like melting. But eventually, we made it to the front and made it onto the rollercoaster.
I climbed into my seat and Aksel came right after. "You gonna hit me in the face like last year?"
I laughed "No, but I might just because you just said that."
The ride started up. It was dark and slow for a bit, I could feel the anticipation build up. Ani and Henry were giggling behind me about something, and some kids were wrestling in front of us. I wondered if it was a good idea that I ate before this.
Suddenly, a drop. It wasn't even that bad, but it was so unexpected, my reflexes kicked in and my hand shot out for Aksels. My face started heating up, I was so embarrassed. Why did I do that? He laughed and rubbed his thumb on my hand, my mind went blank. The ride sped up again and twisted to the side. It kept pushing us back and forth, my shoulders met Aksels. But quicker than expected, the ride came to a slow and ended.
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hii! im back!
im not very proud of this chapter, its not exciting or interesting at all and its rly badly written and it keeps contradicting itself and nothing climactic happens, but its something ig.
im rly rly rly rly rly rly sorry it took so long to be finished, and it sucks so bad now that its out :( im trying though so ig thats good, im glad to be writing again!
i dont have any motive to do anything anymore and its rly hard and overwhelming to do things, so im happy w myself for doing this! its a good step towards being better.
anyway, i love u guys sm and i hope u enjoyed this chapter :D there will be more eventually, i already have a couple drafts for scenes i wanna write
