The Photo-project (Destiel)

Sorrow

Four trys. They needed four trys before Castiel came back. Dean collapsed at his side, sobing. Sherrif Mills just looked at Lucifer with a blank face. "Leave." And he left. Without a word.

The doctors did a few test on Castiel to find the reason for his heart attack. Then they did another surgery. Dean waited. Not able to do something else. A doctor came to him. "He is out of surgery. But hes in coma. The only way his body could handle everything. And we dont know if he will wake up again. If he does in the next three months then he has good chances to recover completly. Every other month decrease his chance dramaticly. and after a year they normally never wake up again. But castiel still isnt over the top. A lot can happen. it looks bad right now. I am sorry." Dean jus nodded. He heard the Doctor but his brain refused to take his words seriuosly. He just sat beside Castiels bed and waited. until he felt asleep, holding Castiels cold hand.

Days went by. Dean never left Castiels room. Bobby, Sam, Jess, Mick, Kylie...they all came to visit. Kylie took some photos, crying while doing so. Lucifer was arrested again after the other Novaks told what happened. Anna was in a mental health clinik. She had a breakdown after she heard what Castiel happened. Soon Dean looked horrible. He refused to eat or to go home to sleep. The nurses tried their best to make him eat at least a bit. But he would never leave. The teachers in school decided to let Dean take a break. Special circumstances. Even if dean would come to class it would make no sense.

It was Friday. A week since castiel got into hospital. A tall guy with dark hair entered. He asked for Castiel novak, the nurse told him. At the doorframe the man stood there and looked. He never met Castiel before. But the poor guy looked horrible. Then he looked at Dean. He was pale and haggard, messy hair and sad eyes starring at Castiel. "Dean?" The man said with a soft voice and entered. Dean looked up. "Dad?" he whispered. "Bobby told me what happened." John smiled sad. "i leave for two weeks and you get the youngest brother of the devil as youre boyfriend, just days before he falls into a coma. Boy, if you want to make trouble just do normal things like stealing a car or something." And John hugged his son. Dean was first suprised but then he couldnt hold back. even if his Dad wasnt the greatest dad in the world and leaves often, it was still his dad. And he cared about his sons. Dean cried. John just stood there and hold him. When dean calmed down and stopped crying John stepped back. "Son, i know you dont want to leave. But you have to eat something. At least a bit. And take a shower, sleep in a real bed, not a chair beside a bed. Come home, at least until tomorrow. " Dean shook his head. Suddenly Jess, Mick and Benny aproached at the door. Jess stepped closer. "Your dad ist right. Castiel wont be alone. Some of us will always be here. And we call as soon as something happens. But think about Castiel when he wakes up and sees you like this, almost starved and dirty." she said with a soft voice. Dean gave up. His father leaded him gently out of the room and into his pickup. The others smiled. They had a shiftplan for Cas-watch. And they had talked to the teacher. Always one was allowed to stay away from school to watch over Castiel. It was the best solution.

Weeks went by and Castiel didnt wake up. Dean went back to school. He had to. The teachers were friendly with him. As soon as school was over Dean drove to the hospital. And he only left on schooldays late at night. He spend the whole weekend with Cas. First he just sat there, silent. But after weeks he started to read to Cas or watch movies with him. Or he just sat there and told him about the day. Sometimes Dean made plan about what they would do when Castiel wakes up. Soon Dean was topic number one around the hospital-staff. The sad guy with his boyfriend in coma, telling him storys about a better life, reading to him. Heartbreaking.

One month went by, a second. And then a third. Dean tried not to think about what the doctor said. Cas would wake up. He had to. And the third month was over. Castiel was still in coma. Dean had holiday. And like everyone expected he refused to leave the hospital. Again. One week, two weeks past by and nothing changed. The monitor sounds haunted Dean in his Dreams.  Day or night, for Dean there was no difference. he felt asleep, he woke up, talked to Cas or just starred at him. A nurse forced him to eat or to take a shower. Then he went back to Cas and felt asleep at his side. Once a week his Dad showed up, dragging the boy home so he could sleep in a real bed more than just one hour and eat a proper meal. Then Dean was back. Three months, three weeks an four day. Dean just sat there feeling sad and empty, holding Castiels hand. Suddenly something moved. Castiel tightend his hand around Deans. Just a bit but Dean felt it. He looked up just at the moment Castiel opened his eyes. The tube that made him breathe didnt allowed Cas to speak. He looked confused and started to gag. Dean jumped up and called the nurse. They came with a doctor, pulling out the tube, adding an other around castiels face that made it easier for him to breathe alone. Then they made a few tests. Reflextest, eye movement... Then the doctor spoke. "Castiel is awake but weak. He will still sleep most of the time. And he is not allow to talk. His throat is sore. But if hes awake a therapist will re-teach him breath and swallow. When he gets stronger he can start muscle-therapie. Months of no use had build them back. It will take a lot of time until he is able to walk alone again and lot more time until he gained back his old condition. But for now its all fine." Dean smiled at Castiel and hugged him carefully. This was the best news he had heard in a long time. Like the doctor promised Castiel spend the most time of the days sleeping. But it was normal sleep, no coma. After Castiel felt asleep the first time Dean called everyone to tell the news. Gabriel went to the mental healt clinic to tell anna. She started to cry. But happy tears this time. Those news would help her a lot. Everyone came to visit the next days. Suddenly Dean noticed something. Over all this time, one person showed never up. Castiels mum. He knew there was only her left since his Dad run away. But she never came to see Castiel. Dean decided to ask gabriel. He looked sad. "She didnt take Lukes return well. She was never able to protect us and we never blamed her. She gave it up when luke almost killed her. But she always gave herself fault. She broke when Castiel felt into Coma. And i guess she couldnt see him like this in case this was the last time she would see him alive. Even now...i guess its better if she stay away." Dean nodded. He could understand it a bit. At least Castiel wasnt alone.

It was painfull and embarresing for Castiel to recover. The first two months he couldnt stand up alone. He felt so helpless. It became better when he was able to go to toilett alone. But Dean would still help him shower. The nurses were suprised but then they let them. To be honest, when Dean asked the nurse the first time if he could help Castiel shower because he could stand alone and felt embarresed to get help from a nurse the nurse was suprised. She asked her boss but no one had a real reason to say no. And in the break when she told the others they all thought it was one of the most adorable things that ever had been done. Dean and Castiel became the privat hospital chick-flic-romance.

Soon Castiel could leave hospital. But instead of home he went with Dean. John told him that he couldnt go back home. His mum could not take care of him, Gabriel still lived with bobby, anna in the mental-healt-clinic. But Castiel didnt complained. He was with Dean, that was enough.